Wedding Day, Pre-Wedding Activities

There is absolutely no way I will be able to post anything after 4:00 this afternoon, so I am breaking my blog routine and posting in the middle of the day. The big news of today has not happened yet and will just have to wait until tomorrow or even the next day when I have actual photos and stories to tell.

So far the day has been delightful. Our breakfasts were delivered to our doors in darling baskets. One could not imagine what a bountiful breakfast could be packed in one basket. Russ and I sat on the porch outside our room, overlooking the water enjoying one of the two sausage egg and cheese croissants. I had a bite of the raspberry scone, but we held back from the blueberry muffins, and yoghurt parfaits and orange juice.

Claire and Carter are staying in the penthouse above us and they came out on their porch with their breakfast too and we had a little celebratory moment that their big day was finally here. The weather is cooperating and it is slightly cool and slightly cloudy which will make for good picture taking opportunities.

After Carter finished her breakfast she came down from her porch to ours where I gave her a little wedding present to commemorate this day. It was a necklace, and I hope every time she wears it, she remembers how happy she was on this day and how much she is loved.

I had a little time alone with my Mom and my sister Janet which I cherished. It means so much to Carter that her grand mother made this big trip at 88. It means so much to me that Janet has been a great guide to get my mother here and look out for her. I could not have done this without her.

There was a fun organized outdoor game session with the young people I joined. We played Bocce and corn hole . All of them could be professional athletes so I was thankful the games were low skill sports. There was a brief four minute shower and after, all the kids helped move the chairs for old people to sit in for the ceremony. Thankfully I am an old person and will have a seat.

Russ took Logan out for a tour of “our Maine life.” Taking him to walk the breakwater in Rockland and see our house in Owls head. I stayed back because I had to get my hair done and hang with Carter and Claire and the girls.

Now that my hair is done I am trapped in my nightgown trying not to mess it up until it is time at the last minute to get dressed for photos. Then off to the ceremony and the party. I think this day is exactly as Carter and Claire envisioned it to be. I could not be happier.

The Guests Have Arrived

Carter and Claire have been planning every detail of this weekend for over a year and a half. So nothing makes me happier than having everything go smoothly for them.

We had a lovely day starting with breakfast on the terrace of the norembega. Since Carter had finished all the flowers I was free today. My friend Warren stopped by to give well wishes to the girls and say hi. Russ and I went down to Owl’s head to meet the the people who own the house we rent every summer.

We have only ever communicated via leaving each other notes in a certain drawer in their house until recently. So since they are here to enjoy their own house we got to finally meet each other. It was so wonderful.

Then all the friends and family started arriving. It is so sweet when you have a small wedding for all your important people to show up and show you so much love.

We had the best wood fired pizzas under the big tree outside and people mingles and got to know each other. After dinner Claire’s Brother’s gave a toast to the girls. It was clear that they believed that Carter and Claire are a great match. Followed by Russ, who wore the very same shoes he wore 34 years and seven weeks ago at our wedding, weaving the story of how the shoes have been there at the start of our family and now the start of Carter and Claire’s family.

As a surprise, Ellis gave a toast for Carter, her sister E, saying that of all the people Ellis knows there are only a few who’s advice she followed, her parents, a few teachers, a tennis coach and Carter.

Needless to say it was a teary time for me. What I really loved was how happy Carter and Claire are together and the outpouring of love from these friends and family.

More love to come tomorrow.

The Day Before the Day Before The Wedding

All the planning has paid off and thankfully the cars were all big enough. Russ and I arrived at the girls house this morning and they had already packed their car to the brim. We looked at the flowers that filled their house, and I thought we were never going to get them all in our car.

Amazingly Carter and Russ “tetrised” those things and got all the flowers loaded. The good thing is they were packed so tightly nothing much moved inside the car. That was an important fact since we were driving that big ass vehicle through Boston and you know that more than one Masshole is going to pull out in front of you without warning. (MAsshole is an official term for a horrible driver, but does not mean that they are necessarily from MA nor does it imply that all MA residents are bad drivers.)

We had a few stops along our route to make, which broke the drive up perfectly. The first was in York, ME at Sara Fitz shop to get PJ’s for the after party. I asked the nice woman working about PJ’s explaining I needed them for my daughter’s wedding. She asked where my daughter was getting married and I said Camden. She looked at me and said, “Are you Carter’s Mom?” Claire’s best friend’s Mom works at the store, but I did not know her. So we took a selfie and she sent it to the girls.

Our second stop was for lunch in Brunswick. I had told Russ about a place I love called Wild Oats that has an amazing Soup bar. It was cold and rainy and I was really looking forward to their Hungarian Mushroom Soup or their fish Chowder. We got to the place at 1:00 and the entire soup bar of at least ten soups was empty, sold out of every soup. Shocking! It’s a Thursday. The cashier told us the bakery also sold out at like 11:00 AM. We got sandwiches which were good, but I was ready for soup.

We arrived at the Norembega, the Inn for the wedding and I can’t tell you how fantastic they are. Abby, the manager found a special storage area for all the flowers that Carter had already made into arrangements. And Pablo helped carry all the flowers that Carter still needs to put in vases to her room on the fourth floor and and our bags to ours on the third!

Russ and I ran into to town and did a tiny amount of shopping before we gathered to go have dinner at Claws with the girls and Barb and Dwayne, Claire’s parents. The girls gave us each presents and notes. Apparently it was a competition to see who could make their parents cry the most.

Barb and I each got Nantucket bracelets with out monogram and Dwayne and Russ got ties and pocket squares to wear at the wedding. We all loved them and will be wearing it all at the wedding, which I hope will not be a crying contest.

It was a perfect day before the day before the wedding. We are all settled into this beautiful place and can’t wait for the guests to come tomorrow.

The Cushion Day

The beauty of a destination wedding is you don’t have to worry about fixing things up at home. The bad thing is you can’t use the wedding as the excuse to fix things up at home. Carter and Claire have been planning the whole wedding. Carter has many spread sheets and canva boards detailing every aspect of the weekend. Since it is away from her home she has to get everything to Maine they need.

Russ and I had an easy flight up to Boston today. The checked bag with the air tags arrived safe and sound. We came today in case there are any travel hiccups, building in this cushion. Our big job for the wedding is to drive the flowers to Maine tomorrow.

Carter worked at a florist in college and is doing all her own flowers. She is certainly capable, but more importantly she loves doing it. So Russ rented a big ass vehicle so we can fit the flowers in it and keep them cool.

We went to the girls house and saw the flowers in process. They are beautiful and I hope we can fit them all in tomorrow. Claire’s parents drove up from Connecticut and stopped at the girls house so we could pack their big ass car with all the welcome bags and decor the girls are bringing. We will meet them in Camden tomorrow.

Russ and I are staying at our regular place in the Seaport. He took me to Mr. H for a special Chinese dinner tonight. Boston is perfect today. The World Cup visitors are out and about loving Boston. The temperature was 72° and no humidity. Let’s hope our weekend is as beautiful. So far we are having a blast.

I Hate a Checked Bag

I have been such a devoted carry-on only packer for so many years that it is painful for me to think about taking a larger suit case on a plane. It does not matter if I get a checked bag for free. I just don’t want to check a bag if I don’t have to.

If I do have to check Bag because, say Russ and I have a wedding and need clothes for three seasons and ten days away then I I have the issue of what goes in the carry-on a nd what gets checked.

The last two times Russ checked bags were when Carter was young and we went to Ireland and Italy. On the Ireland trip they lost Russ’ bag. All his clothes and shoes were missing for three days. If you think they have pants in 37” inseam or size 14 AAA shoes in Ireland you are a sadly mistaken. Then the next year we went to Italy and the airline lost both Russ and Carter’s bags for three days. Russ still has some Italian underwear we bought there that he wears when he wants to scare me.

So now that I have to check a bag that I am sharing with Russ I put all my least important things in it. Like my rain coat and sandals. My very important things, like my dress for the wedding are in my carry on.

The other issue is I have not bought a larger suitcase in years. I was not about to buy a new suit case to use this one time. Russ pulled out my very favorite lands end rolling duffle. The thing I like about it is the bottom compartment is totally separate so I can put all the shoes, mine and Russ’ giant ass shoes in one compartment away from clothes.

Please pray nothing happens to this checked bag. It goes against everything I am about, but it just can’t be helped.

The Kindness of My Church

Many Christians have given themselves a bad name by lining up with politicians who are anything but Christian like. They don’t love their neighbors, and they don’t care. Russ and I have been lucky enough to go to a church in Durham which is the opposite. And last week our church put out a statement of public Witness that I am very proud of.

We are Presbyterians and nothing that happens In our church is knee jerk. Everything is studied and discussed and gone over by multiple committees and discussed and rewritten and edited and discussed. Eventually a thoughtful communication is released. But it is said out loud and proud. And I think it should be shared with more than just my little church.

The Westminster Presbyterian Church Statement of Public Witness

For much of our history, the people of Westminster Presbyterian Church in Durham, NC, have found inspiration and call in the words of Micah 6:8. In a time of uncertainty, God’s people asked Micah what they should do. The prophet replied that God has told them what is good, and right, and true: “…and what does the Lord require of you, but to do justice, love kindness, and walk humbly with our God?”

We, the Session of WPC, feel the weight of this present moment.

We see the conflict and turmoil in our common life roiling in our hearts, minds, and spirits.

We fear for our immigrant and refugee neighbors, people Christians are called to welcome.

We hear too many voices – in media, in culture, in government, and even in churches – speaking with calloused bluster and cruelty, twisting the language of God to vilify their opponents and to demonize the poor.

We prioritize our own comfort, and in our moments of silence, we become complicit. Because we seek to follow Jesus, who is the Way, the Truth, and the Life, we feel called to affirm our faith.

We are called to do justice – to actively work towards righting what is wrong, especially for the most vulnerable among us. We are called to care for the immediate needs of those suffering. And we are called to commit to the long-term work of creating a society that prioritizes the flourishing of all God’s children, on earth as it is in heaven. We believe that doing justice in this time requires standing with and protecting our neighbors who are being mistreated; calling out those who prioritize the interests of the wealthy and the powerful over the poor and marginalized; and peacefully using our voices to speak out against violence and corruption.  

We are called to love kindness – to affirm the God-given humanity of every person. God created each person in God’s own image, underscoring their worth and unique place in the tapestry of God’s kingdom, no matter their race, gender, sexuality, or nationality. Loving kindness calls us to love God and others with all of our heart, mind, soul, and strength, and to work tirelessly on behalf of the most vulnerable. We are called to treat everyone with deep respect, to use human-centered and loving language, and to work alongside those in need. For Christians, the essence of loving kindness is to reject violence in all its forms. 

We are called to walk humbly with our God – to affirm that God is God, and that we have all sinned and fall short of the glory of God. We live in a world where our neighbors are treated disrespectfully because of their race or gender, where our Muslim and Jewish neighbors fear for their safety in houses of worship, where our immigrant neighbors fear being separated from their families and communities. We are called to follow the example set by Jesus: to live in harmony with the earth, to extend the hand of friendship, and with God’s help, to love our enemies. Walking humbly also calls us to be more curious than judgmental of those with whom we disagree and to seek common ground and common purpose for the betterment of all God’s children. 

And as we speak and act, we pray that Christ might guide us, in community and through prayer. “Now to him who by the power at work within us is able to do far more abundantly all that we ask or think, to him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” (Ephesians 3:20)

The Nicest Guy Brings it Home to NYC

It took 53 years for the NY Knicks to win the playoffs. And the joy heard in the streets last night on all the recordings I saw was heartfelt. I am so happy for NY because this was accomplished with the leadership of one of the nicest guys I went to college with, Leon Rose.

Leon has been the president of the Knicks since March of 2020. Could not have been the easiest time to start a new job. He took this job after being a most successful sports agent for the likes of LeBron James, Dwayne Wade, Carmelo Anthony to name just a few of his clients. I thought when I heard he took that job that he had an almost insurmountable task, but was ever hopeful for him.

Leon and I were friends in the same class at Dickinson College where he played basketball. He was a not too tall Jewish kid from Cherry Hill, NJ, but he was fast and smart and just about the nicest guy. He was good friends with my sophomore suite mate Laurie, who played girls basketball. If you asked me one word to describe Leon is would have been, “smiling.”

Last night, after the Knicks won game five, in the post game interview he talked about the team being a family. He was the same friendly guy in college. He had a strong friend group that he seemed to treat like a family then.

His success does not surprise me one bit. It couldn’t happen to a nicer guy. I just wish that his great friend Danny Allanoff was still alive to share in this excitement. Hooray for Leon Rose, class of ‘83. You made us all smile.

Being Early is Killing Me

I am a planner and an early preparer. I am usually early to places and I anticipate what might go wrong and have back up plans. This is a life long trait from being the oldest child of two oldest children. I never once missed the school bus. There was even a back up plan for my school bus that if I missed it on my side of the street I could cross the street and walk down a few houses and get it on the way back since it made a loop and drove both ways on my road. I never even did that. The idea of missing my pick up horrified me.

Once I thought I might have missed the bus because the 4 boys who lived door to me were not at our bus stop and I assumed the bus came already and I missed it. Turned out they had gone away and were missing school that day. Thankfully the bus came before I crossed the street to try and catch it on the way back. This happened over the 50 years ago and I still remember it.

So as a person who plans well in advance I am ready for Carter’s wedding. There is not a lot that I had to do as Carter and Claire have everything under control. The things I need to do, I need to do in Maine and Carter will tell me exactly what those are.

So even though I have left these last few days free to get stuff done for the wedding, there is nothing for me to do. I have laid out the clothes and shoes to pack, but don’t want to pack them so they get squished more than they need to. I have asked Russ to look at his clothes and he has done that. I have written my speech, which I will rewrite again tomorrow and again on Tuesday, but there is only so much writing and rewriting I can do.

It would be nice if I could test out make-up, but since I have a sever skin allergy I can’t possibly test anything now because if I have an allergic reaction to it I won’t have time to recover. So no makeup for me, other than mascara and lipstick.

I wish I left more things to do right now because I am sitting around like a kid waiting for Christmas. As I write I see some splits in a quilt on my bed. I could be repairing these, but that is not the kind of busy work I want to do. I did make a Christmas ornament today, working ahead of my one per month schedule. It’s just being early is killing me.

Did I hit a Nerve?

I have been writing this blog for over 14 years. I have never accepted any paid advertising, or sponsors. So I answer to no one. I make no money on it despite offers and I don’t plan on ever doing that. I don’t write to make money for myself. I did start it to raise money for the food bank in the beginning and it did that. But that impetus for starting is not my reason for sticking to it all these years.

At this point, this blog is my memory. I do it purely for myself and if my readers get any joy out of it, hooray. The topics I write about vary and there is no rhyme or reason what I am going to write about on any given day.

Sometimes it is something funny that happened that day, sometimes it is a recipe I just made up and will certainly forget if I don’t write it down. Sometime it is a thank you to someone who has been kind. Sometime it is a rant about something going on in the world or just with me. Sometimes it is a celebration.

Because of this blog I hear from my friends and family daily and it prompts lots of great conversations. It also means that when I see a friend in real life we can skip talking about me and we can talk all about them since, if they read this, they know what I have been doing. The only caveat is when I want to spill the tea that I purposefully did not blog about. Trust me, there are lots of things I don’t blog about, that would make a much more juicy blog, but for the sake of humanity I don’t put those things out in the universe.

I do have lots of readers who I have never met. I know this because I get analytics showing me where readers are located. A couple of days last week someone in Hong Kong read 176 different posts in two days. I am certain I don’t know that person. Or the readers from India, Indonesia, Chile, Serbia or Austria who read yesterday. I always pray that they have a good sense of humor and understand when I am being sarcastic.

Sometimes I write things that people don’t like. No problem. I am not writing for you to like me, but I am writing to say things I think should be said out loud and I am not afraid to say them.

I am not writing things to indoctrinate anyone and I invite discussion. Rarely do people who disagree with me write back anything thoughtful. If they disagree they might write me an insult, but since they don’t actually know me, the insults rarely land.

All I can say to the haters is, I am sorry if the mirror I held up made you dislike what you saw. If you would like to write a more thoughtful rebuttal, please do. Otherwise, don’t bother reading me. I am just going to make you mad, and without getting to actually know me your insults will have no effect on me.

To my kindred spirits, thank you for your kind comments. I do appreciate when I hear from you. Your kindnesses are noticed. And as always, I apologize for all the misspellings and grammatical mistakes that I publish daily. Since my practice is write for twenty minutes or less and get it out I KNOW there are lots of mistakes. Again, I don’t care, as long as it is not a mistake that hurts someone. My intention is never to hurt anyone personally, well with one exception.

Bad Shipping

Fed ex used to be the gold standard in over night delivery. When it was in it’s hay day I didn’t say. “I am sending it to you.” Instead I would say, “I’m fed exing it to you,” and every knew that meant I sending it over night and you will get it by 10:30 in the morning, no questions asked.

I am not sure when the decline of fed ex started, but now a-days I don’t want to send or receive anything by fed ex. On May 24 I ordered a purse from Rue Lala that I wanted to go on the wedding trip. There was not an expedited shipping option, but since it was over three weeks in advance I was sure it would be ok. What I did not know is they were going to use Fed ex as the shipper.

I got noticed that the package was sent. I used the online tracking system to see when it was picked up and sent along the route. On May 27 the purse arrived at the fed ex facility in Kernersville, NC. A mere 90 miles away from me. And there it sat. For days and days.

I tried contacting Fed Ex and never got a single response to any form of communication. I tried contacting Rue Lala , but since it was usually not business hours I just got the AI helper, who was no help. I sent an email asking about it. No response. So today I actually got through on the phone to a real person at Rue La La. They sent me to another real person who was quite helpful. Helpful at refunding me my money. Not what I wanted. I wanted the purse.

Miss Rue said the package is considered lost after 10 days stuck in one place. There is not enough time to send me another one. She refunded me and gave me $15 in Rue Credit for my trouble, but I would rather have the purse.

I am very interested in where in the world a package actually disappears to when it has been logged into a facility. Do employees just steal things? Do animals break in and take packages? If so, why don’t they just take things with food?

Who pays the price for this mistake? Someone is losing money and lots of companies are losing me as a customer. My big question is how can I ensure that packages don’t get sent to me via fed ex? I guess I will just stop buying things except in person and since I hate doing that I am going to have to stop buying things all together. If I look a little run down you will know why.

The Kindness of Friends

Yesterday I wrote in this blog about the weather for Carter’s upcoming wedding, I mentioned I was looking forward a wrap in case I get cold in my dress. In a matter of hours I had ten offers from friends far and wide offering their pashmina and wraps.

Carter’s mother-in-law sent me a photo offering a beautiful blue one and also a Navy. My Friend Sally, a green one, she would mail me. Judy was ready to drive over to my house this morning. Jan and Suzanne offered help. Ellie had a dozen to choose from. Cathy, Betsy and Mary all wanted to see my dress so they could loan me the perfect one. My sister Janet, who has an accessory business, up and mailed 25 wraps to the hotel for not just me, but every woman coming to the wedding.

I am all set now, but really appreciate the giant outpouring of help. What a dear community of friends you are. I didn’t title the blog, “I need a pashmina.” You had to get to the need deep in. I appreciate the fact that you had to drag them out and some took photos and sent them to me.

What I really hope is now that I have this plethora of choices and plenty arriving that they will be totally unneeded and the weather is warm. What I love most are the offers of love. Thank you dear friends.

Wedding Weather

There is one thing about a wedding I have no control over… the weather. I remember two yers ago when my friend Suzanne’s daughter Grace was getting married. For the days before the outdoor wedding a rare New England Hurricane was predicted to hit right on the day of the wedding. Suzanne ordered 200 giant clear plastic umbrellas. Thankfully at the last minute the hurricane changed course and the day was sunny and perfect. The umbrellas were returned unopened!

I am looking at my wardrobe and trying to plan for all the weather options. The one thing I have not been able to find is a wrap that I like to go with my light blue dress. I have a light blue pashmina which is not exactly the right color. I have a dark green one, which is not quite right.

I don’t have a navy, white or light green pashmina and can’t seem to find one that is right. It seems that it is not the right time of year to sell these in stores and looking online is so difficult to see if something is the right color.

I pray it is not cold because my shoes for the wedding are sandals and I fear cold feet. But I do not have a back up shoe. Since we are flying to the wedding I don’t want to bring ten pairs of shoes.

I have outfits in mind, but need to tweak them as I get a better idea of what the actual weather might be closer to departure day. I really don’t want to bring a winter jacket, but it is Maine in June and might need one.

So many decisions to make and back up plans. I thankfully will not have to order 200 umbrellas no matter what.

No More Mail Duke Energy

I get more mail, both e and snail, from Duke energy than I need. Twice a Month I get notifications about my energy usage. The paper version gives me a 12 month graph of my energy usage and compares my house to an energy efficient house and an average house. Since I live in an 80 year old house I assume it is not built to be the most efficient house given my old windows and not smart wiring, but I often meet or exceed the rating for an efficient house.

My graph has remain very consistent for as long as I have been getting this information. My usage goes up the most during the hottest months due to running air conditioning. But year over year tends are identical.

In the middle of the month I get an email telling me if I am on track to use about what is expected. I am not sure how I would change my life if I needed to cut down my electrical usage for the last two weeks of the month. I can’t unplug my refrigerators. I certainly am not going to go around and unplug all my TVs when I am not watching them. Lamps are all going to stay plugged in. I am still going to charge my electronics.

I could bump the air up a degree, but I would prefer to stay married. Since I have direct withdrawal to pay my bill I have never been late let alone defaulted. So I would like Duke to save heir money and stop mailing me the graph showing me I am better than average if not sometimes efficient. And as for the mid month update on how my usage is going, perhaps only send it if I use wildly more than I have ever used before.

The only thing Duke should email me is my actual bill. All this information can be included in that and stop trying to shame me if my house is not the most efficient. I am not interested in personal insight about my energy usage. I don’t use that much.

What I Learned From Rita Shae in 1978

I was in high school when Jones Town happened. It was a most shocking story that unfolded in real time on the news. My history teacher Rita Shae would talk about it and drew parallels with other malignant narcissists like Hilter. She described how cult leaders got people to buy into them as some kind of messiah. Once they did, the leader would demand greater and greater acts of contrition to prove their loyalty.

Despite how dangerous the requests from the leader were, once people had bought into the messiah story, they were all but powerless to not obey.

As a rebellious teenager this seemed ridiculous to me. How could perfectly sane people, so blindly follow a person who clearly did not have their best interests at heart? The mass suicide at Jonestown where 909 people took their lives because Jim Jones told them too was unimaginable. But it happened.

I will not name the malignant narcissist who currently lives in government housing, but we should all be fearful of how the stories of these types of people end. And the ending is not just for the narcissist, but also for the followers who doubled down on following them. The confirmation bias we all have to try and justify our own earlier decisions makes this all predictable.

85 people survived Jones town because their will to live or other random circumstances saved them from certain death. We need people adjacent to the power to wake up and shake themselves free of their cultish devotion and stop the narcissist. Following the current path will not end well. Just look to the fate of the defendants at the Nuremberg trials. Eventually everyone pays the price.

Rita Shae was a Radcliffe educated, Princeton Review Scholar, who I also heard rumored had worked for the CIA at some point. She was a great history teacher who I learned so much from. I took US history from her and topics in History. (That was probably not the name, but I can’t remember the exact title of the course, despite it being my favorite course senior year.) She would often call on me in class to represent the American worker point of view as I had spent the summer between my junior and senior year working in a printing factory. It was something very few, if any, of my boarding school classmates did in the summer.

I wish she were alive to discuss all the parallels going on now, with past history. She had a great way of weaving the stories together and predicting the outcomes. But I am thankful she does not have to witness what is going on. It would break her heart.

Pride Means Proud

It’s June and that means Pride month. For many years people in the LGBTQ+ communities had to hide their true selves for fear of being ostracized at best and physically hurt at worst. So as an act of self love Pride was born. A whole community of people had to show each other and the world that they loved themselves and thus were also entitled to be loved by others.

I am a strong ally to the LGBTQ+ community and have been for years. When I was a kid I knew friends of my parents who were gay. People who worked for my father at Avon who were gay and smart, attractive and successful. Then in college I had gay friends. Some I knew were gay before they admitted it to me. It made no difference to me that they were gay. They were fun, brilliant and kind.

I graduated and moved to Washington, DC a city run by gay people. Then and now. I have many gay friends from my Washington Days. One day I was having dinner with my friends Art and Chris. I was saying that my sister had just flown into DC from Boulder to visit my parents and I had picked her up at the airport. She had not said anything to me, but suddenly it dawned on me while having dinner that she was a lesbian. Since she was nine years younger than I am I had not spent much time thinking about her sexuality. But there was something about seeing her walk off the airplane in her cowboy hat that made me realize she was gay and always had been. She is by far the smartest, most hard working person in the family. Being gay was not her most important trait.

At least twenty years ago I remember my pastor Hayward Holderness give a sermon about the acceptance of gay people. One line really stood out for me. “God doesn’t make any junk.” He was espousing the thought that God made us all, all in his image. So God made gay people, just like he made everyone else. And who are we mortals to judge that anyone of us are better than any others. Only God can judge.

So when Carter was in high school and came out to me I was fine with that. God made her the way she is meant to be. I knew that being gay is not the most important thing about her. Being a good person, hard working, kind, curious and loving are her main attributes. Being gay is like having blue eyes. She was born that way.

So in this month of June, LGBTQ+ Pride month, I am proud of how my girl lives her truth and found love with Claire. The only thing a parent wants is for their child to find love with a good person and be happy. So I am proud of how my daughter lives out loud.

It’s Almost Time

Carter and Claire’s wedding is two weeks away. I went to write my blog tonight and realized that what I was going to write about should be shared with them at their wedding. So I saved what I had started because the last thing I want to do is have my wedding speech be a repeat of a blog.

I have so many wonderful stories and thoughts about Carter I want to write about, but I want to write my wedding speech first and use all my best material there. I have known that I was to give the talk at their wedding reception for nine months and have made a few notes, but not written the actual thing yet. I guess it’s time to actually do it.

So tonight will be brief as I am chomping at the bit to get some of these stories down and begin to craft the narrative. What I will share tonight is one of my favorite photos of Carter at about 3 and half. Hard to believe this little bug is going to be a Sadie, Sadie married lady very soon.

Shaggy Shay Shay

I was only gone four days this week, but I came home to a wooly mammoth. Baby Shay’s hair seemed to have grown twice it’s length in just a few days. She can hardly see me through the bangs that cover her eyes.

She was happy to “see” me when I spoke loudly enough for her to recognize I was home. The first thing she did was take me up to our room so she could snuggle with me. She did that until Russ came in and then she went right over to him.

So glad to be home with both of them. I definitely need to get Shay a haircut before we go to Carter’s wedding. Shay does not get to go to the wedding, but she should be cleaned up to stay with her dear friend Mary.

Sorry sweet girl, I did not realize how long your hair was.

Day Two Beach Mah Jongg

I love day two of Teaching beginners. They get to really play games and are slightly less anxious than they are the first day. I do less talking, and they do more. (Less talking is still relative.)

Today I got to have lunch with the Dunn girls. I had taught them before and it was nice to have them back in class. It is so nice to have students return.

While I was teaching at Dunes my friends were at Mah Jongg lunch and play at Coral Bay. After my classes ended I got to hear about how Mary Jo, Bit, Martha and Jill, met and had lunch with Reba, Ann, Betty and Neppie. Someday I will not be teaching and maybe I will be playing. But then of course the only reason I am down here is because I’m teaching. So I guess I will just have to keep doing that so I can at least have dinner with my friends.

Speaking of dinner, my hostess, who does not want any public credit, made the most fabulous dinner of a fresh caught local snapper. We had just the best time laughing at dinner enjoying her fabulous meal and secret star dessert which can not be mentioned.

I so cherish the friendships I have made because of teaching mah Jongg. It is such a joy to meet so many fun and dear people. The bonus is how much time I get to spend with them over the years. I know someday I will run out of people to teach since as Martha said tonight, “Haven’t you already taught everyone in North Carolina?” Thank goodness North Carolina keeps getting more people.

Beach Party

When I come to the beach and stay with Jill she makes it a party by inviting fun friends to come and stay while I am here. So today while I was at the Dunes Club teaching, Bit and Martha arrived at Jill’s.

The party was on by the time I got back from class and then Mary Jo arrived making a party of five. We enjoyed cocktails on the porch while we caught up. One of Bit’s sweet daughters stopped by and visited with us. Before we knew it it was time to go to dinner.

Thankfully we all fit in Jill’s car and I was the designated driver. (The real reason people have me as their friend). We went over to Aqua in Beaufort and had a lovely meal. Mary Jo, who has my exact haircut asked if she should get her hair cut like mine. We took a photo to show her that her hair is already the same as mine. Except Bit rightfully pointed out to Mary Jo that her hair was thicker and had more body. Which I agreed with. Mary Jo suggested that I could dye my hair white so then we would have the same hair.

It was a lovely dinner, but we wanted to make it fast because the Hurricanes are playing the first game in the Stanley cup and Martha, Jill and Bit wanted to get back to watch the game. I pray they win so the party will continue. I unfortunately have to turn in early since I have work in the morning. I have no worries that we will have another party tomorrow.

A Day Early

I’m down at the beach this week to kick off the summer mah Jongg classes at the Dunes Club. Normally I drive down at the crack of dawn and roll right into teaching six hours of classes after three hours of driving. But I am staying with my friend Jill and she suggested I come in a day early so that I can sleep like a normal human. Since I am a senior citizen now I thought, “Jill is right.” (Jill is always right.) So I came today. It has been such a pleasure to leisurely drive down, stop where I want and get to spend time visiting with Jill.

Speaking of stopping. I made one stop in Kinston, as I always will, given the time. I dropped off the ornament I made this weekend to Ann Cherry. It was her mother’s needlework she had given me a year ago that I used to practice finishing an ornament. It was not perfect, but was good enough for me to return the precious heirloom back to Ann. She hung it on her break front which holds her grandmother’s china. It was also just great to see Ann and Francis, who was with Ann when I gave her the ornament.

I made another stop to look at some clothes in Morehead and ran into my friend Debbie Aiken and met her sister from Charlotte. Apparently I can’t go anywhere in eastern North Carolina and not see friends. Isn’t that the best?

The only problem with coming early is I did buy some cute clothes. I may have to go back to driving down at the last minute with no time to spare because coming early is so expensive.