Not Enough Studying Time For Me

As Carter is busy studying for exams I am dreaming of school ending and a life of carefree days.   Then I went and did something that has suddenly added hundreds of things to my plate. I booked a trip to Africa for me and Russ to go on while Carter is at camp. So much for free time, I hardly have enough time to get ready.

I have a new camera that Russ gave me for Christmas and I scarcely understand half of it. Russ even got me a “compact field guide” to learn how to use this powerful machine and I don’t understand almost every third word in the book. Now I need a crash course in my camera and I need to rent a bigger lens and learn to use that. So add to the list of things to do, research lens rental companies as well as figure out which is the right lens for wildlife shooting that is not too heavy for me to carry. Sounds like a first world problem that I should not be whining about.

The next problem is figuring out clothes to take to Africa and finding pants for Russ to take. We only get to take one small roll-a-board suitcase each since we will be flying on tiny bush flights. There is no need for anything fancy, but we do need good hiking shoes and warm clothes since it is winter there. Being winter the bush will be down so we need to wear “blend-in-brown” clothing, not something I own much of. This is no “Out of Africa” –trunks full of flowing gowns type trip.

I am so thankful that I am a smaller size because searching for “safari wear” is difficult at best for me and almost impossible for Russ. Apparently no one over 5’ 10” buys safari type pants because most of the inseams available for men are in the 30”-32” range and he needs 36”. Safaris are not the time you want to wear floods because you are trying to protect yourself from bug bites.

Speaking of bugs we have to go Monday to the travel clinic and get all the yellow fever and malaria type shots and pills. I like to be prepared for all possible illnesses when visiting other worlds, but given my very limited luggage situation I am going to have to be judicious in my anti-getting sick, or pro-getting well medicinal supplies. It’s not like I am going to have a CVS nearby.

I am most thankful for I-pads to “carry” all reading material. Please send me recommendations of your favorite reads so I can load up before I take off. We have 27 hours of flying there and back and there is only so much needlepoint I can do. That reminds me, I need batteries for my headlamp. It looks ridiculous, but makes stitching on dark flights so much easier. Now I wonder were my Africa plug adaptors are? So much to do and so little time.

Vegetable Mountain

There are people in my house who would turn their noses up at certain vegetables and gobble down bowls full of others. Sometimes I can get them to try something they swear they hate if I hide it with other things. Only then does a vegetable hater discover they don’t dislike something as much as they thought.

Vegetable Mountain is the perfect way to use up small bits of vegetables and get some eaten by all. The best base of the mountain is potatoes since it is universally the favorite and if it is at the bottom they have take some real veggies in order to get to the starchy base.

This mountain started with thinly sliced new potatoes cooked in a fry pan with a bit of water until soft and then allowed to crisp up a bit as the water cooks away. The next layer is oven roasted cauliflower, followed by pan sautéed zucchini, blanched sugar snap peas, green peas and topped with a bit of oyster mushrooms.

The secret is to salt and pepper each vegetables well when cooking them individually and then assemble it all at once. Vegetable Mountain can be eaten hot or at room temperature. Any veggies can be used and the more color the better. I wish I had some roasted red pepper to add to this one.

Note:  Despite the best laid plans Carter still picked out the cauliflower and mushrooms.

Do 100 Laughs and 50 Smiles and Call Me in the Morning

A friend stopped me today and asked if I had work done because the skin on face was not so saggy. She quickly corrected herself by saying, “Of course you didn’t because if you had it would have been on the blog.” You got that right, sister. If I had under gone any kind of improvement treatment it would be fodder for this space. I don’t have enough time in the day to get a facelift and come up with something else to write about.

I have to thank this friend for thinking that I might have had work, but she is right, my face is not very saggy considering how much fat has been melted out of it. To make her feel better I said that the sag in my upper arms and my thighs is dramatic. I am wondering what I am doing to my face that I need to do to the rest of me? I don’t use any special and outrageously expensive creams. I can’t even try them since I am highly allergic to most potions.

I guess that smiling has been the exercise that has tightened up my skin– smiling and laughing. It might cause some small lines around the eyes and maybe those parenthesis lines around the mouth, but laughing loud and often has been my constant in life. It is the only thing I can think of that has made my face seem perky. If I were frowning and dour I bet the skin on my face would look saggy. Perhaps I have just created an illusion of tight skin because I was smiling at my friend.

So laughing is the answer for the face, but all that laughing makes the really saggy parts of me giggle and draws attention to how loose I really am. That giggle is only attractive on a jolly ‘ole elf with a bowl full of jelly for a stomach. For me I am going to just have to keep the giggly bits covered or compressed or disguised. I guess I won’t have to revert to wearing a burqa as long as I keep laughing and smiling.

If I appear to be some simpleton know I am just doing my face exercises.

Memorial Day

As a child growing up in the 60’s I thought the news was the report of how many people died that day. The reason I thought this was Walter Cronkite always started the news by saying, “Nine died today in Vietnam,” or 12 or 34. It wasn’t until I got a little older did I comprehend what Vietnam was and that the news was not a report of everyone who died in the world.

I eventually came to hate the war, not just for the dying, but also for the tedium and the arguing that seemed to go on about it. Being a Beatles fan I adopted the “All we need is love,” mantra. I had a poster in my room that was a rusted scarecrow like figure made out of an army rifle, helmet and one of those bullet belts set up in a field of tall grown flowers. The caption under the figure read, “What if they gave a war and nobody came?”

It seemed like a logical question to me as a child in single digits. What was all the fighting about? The adults around me could not really explain it in a way that justified the numbers of dead that opened the news every night.

Today is Memorial Day; the time to honor those who lost their lives in all our wars, not just the popular ones, if you can ever say any war is popular. So thanks to those who made the ultimate sacrifice, but lets try and remember those people everyday before we get into some conflict that causes us to send young people into battle.

Let’s not get into a conflict that goes on for so many years that we can’t remember why we started fighting in the first place. As John Lennon put it, “Give peace a chance.” Let’s not add to the numbers of young men and women we need to remember on this day in the future.

Necessary Creativity

Today Carter had to study for her impending exams so for her sanity as well as mine Russ and I left her home alone while we took Shay Shay to the farm for some off leash running and some family visits. It was the perfect day for the farm with low humidity and temperate warmth. Even though it was an ideal walking day I did not get all my steps in at the farm because there were so many stories to listen to.

My father had a lot of opinions about my blog and most recently the Graduation Advice about daydreaming. He recounted a story about a speech a boss of his at Avon, Jim Clitter, gave when my Dad was a young executive. Clitter told the audience that creativity came out of necessity.

My dad took his advice to heart. So when he created a new fragrance line called “Charisma” my Dad sent, and back in the old non-internet days that meant messengering, all the Vice President’s wives a mock-up of the kind of racy campaign materials for “Charisma” that were clearly targeted at women, along with a sample of the product. He asked the women to look over the campaign and if they liked it to tell their husbands to vote for it at their upcoming meeting.

What my father knew was that women were his target audience and if his fate was left up to a room full of men he might not get their approval. He came up with the creative way to show the all-male group that he knew what women wanted in a fragrance. Thank goodness he was right and the wives told their husbands to vote “yes.” When my Dad went to the meeting to present the campaign he got a standing ovation thanks to his “wives campaign.”

Today, my Dad told me all his creative ideas happened between five and eight in the morning. All my life he has been a morning person. He used to get up at 4:30 to catch the earliest possible train into New York City to get to work first. I now understand it was a necessity because if his best thinking was going to end by eight am that did not leave much time.

I’m sure that “wives campaign” was a risky thing for my Dad to do. He was still a young guy in a new company, but I’m sure that the success gave him courage to continue to try other brilliant but risky moves. One famous one was when my Dad was working at Sprint and they had just finished building the first all digital long distance network. To help drive the point home that Sprint was way ahead of the rest of the phone world my father made a commercial of blowing up an old telephone tower without getting permission from the network guys. The ad was exciting and made lots of news, which in turn got lots of customers.

My Dad was called on the carpet and told that the network guys were mad because they could have sold the antiquated equipment to a third world nation for $25,000. The network guys had no idea how much more valuable that tower was as a symbol of “out with the old and in with the new.” They did not have the same necessity for gaining new customers that my father did, and creativity was never the strong suit of guys in “network.”

Consider these two stories a counterpoint to the daydreaming advice I wrote about last week. I know my father may say his creativity came out of necessity, but I think that being creative is just a lot more fun and he was always one who liked to have fun. My charge is for you to consider a problem you might want to tackle at five in the morning and see what crazy solution you can come up with to solve it. You might not know that you are really an early morning person because you never had to get up and catch a train that early.

Graduation Advice

Carter asked me if I would take her to the Durham Academy graduation today. I was happy to do it so I could get the lay of the land for when her graduation will happen in just a few short years.   I also really like graduation speeches since I feel like there is a lot of pressure to tell graduates something important and profound on this momentous occasion. I say this and I can’t actually remember anything I was told at any of my graduations, but I’m sure lack of sleep has everything to do with that and perhaps other celebratory reasons.

The Reverend Willimon from Duke Divinity gave the commencement address and he encouraged the graduates who have just finished 13 years being focused on learning at DA to daydream. He sighted great thinkers and inventors who had ADD and made stupendous creative achievements because they were not always focused.

I agree with him whole-heartedly. If ever I have had a creative idea it came about during a period of rest, relaxation or when I was actually sleeping. Rarely have I come up with anything close to brilliant when I was trying to. How can I encourage this in my child yet still keep her on task in school? This is the true balancing act.

The two valedictorians also spoke and I assume they did not know what Dr. Willimon was going to say, but their advice followed along the same lines. The first young man who clearly is so much smarter than I am had lots of important things to say, some of which were way over my head. One thing I did get from him was that it may seem like all the good ideas are taken, but there is more to be done. He charged his classmates with this, “Even if you can’t come up with the next good idea you can support one.”

The second valedictorian summed up his speech with these three points, “Take risks, foster face-to-face connections and giveback and say thanks.” All good advice. It is so much easier for me to recognize sage counsel this far from my own graduation. I hope that some of these smart words soaked into the young people in the audience and on the stage.

It is easy to get caught up in the minutia of day to day that we miss the big picture and that picture is so much smaller in the rear view mirror. But it is never too late to live your life bigger than you are living it now. So consider this your graduation day and go forth and day dream, support good ideas, giveback and say thanks and your life will have been worthy.

Happy Birthday Shay Shay

For years Carter would beg us to get her a dog. Being an only child and knowing that we could not get her an older brother she thought her best bet for a sibling was a dog. Since Russ has terrible allergies to both dogs and cats I used to tell Carter that is was more important to keep Daddy alive than have a dog.

I too wanted a dog. I had a beloved dog I got between my sophomore and junior years in college when I moved off campus. My dog Beau went everywhere with me and was my best companion.

Sometime a few years ago our family spent time with a labradoodle and Russ discovered that he was not allergic to that breed. So the search began for a dog that Carter could love and would not kill Russ.

We ended up getting our baby Shay Shay (Carter named her the Americanized version of the Chinese word for thank you.) We were not completely sure that Russ would be OK with her, but we took a chance and it worked out.

Today is Shay’s third birthday and she is clearly the most important member of our family. Everybody fights over having her sleep with them. Of course if she gets to choose she will stay with Russ who is her favorite. IT is not always a good thing for him since she tends to snuggle him right off the side of the bed.

So happy birthday to our best baby. None of us could imagine life without her now. I’m glad that Carter never gave up her campaign to get a dog. She was right; our family was not complete without her.

What’s Your Plan?

Recently I was at a luncheon and a planned giving professional introduced herself to me and the group I was sitting with. It was a social event so my group was not prepared to talk about planned giving. The professional knew this was not a place for her to work the room and thought she was just meeting people, but that was before she met me. As someone who is happy to help people part with their money for a good cause I see people in development as always working so I asked this person some questions about her job thinking she might teach me a thing or two.

In case you don’t know what planned giving is, it is about what you plan to do with your money when you are dead.   Not everyone is lucky enough to have any money leftover when they die, but no matter how little or how much it is a much better idea to make a plan than leave it up to the government who decides they get it if you don’t have a will or a family member with a good lawyer.

Back to the story, so as this professional was explaining what she does she asks me if her organization was in my will. No, I tell her to which she quickly responded that it should be.   Whoa, whoa, whoa. Poor women made a grave error in her phrasing and I was quick to jump on that.

“I think it would be better to ask me, ‘What can we do to be one of the beneficiaries of your estate?’” I told this Pro. She realized that she had backed herself into a no win conversation with me and started back peddling.

I am sure she knew better than to tell a potential donor that “I SHOULD” give to her, but I am not sure she had ever had anyone tell her she should have more finesse when doing her job. See, I just can’t help myself when I see a training opportunity when it comes to a sales person, and development people are the ultimate sales people, they just sell a good feeling.

As I continued to probe this pro for information about how successful she was I found out that her organization often got money because a donor outlives all the other people listed as beneficiaries and her organization might have been the only non-human in the will. It got me thinking about our own wills and how short the list is of people we want our money to go to. Now don’t get excited, I’m not looking to add any of you readers to our will, so don’t call me, but I had not thought about what would happen if we outlived our list.

Despite my own call to action to so many people about giving to worthy causes I think I have been neglecting my own plan for when I am no longer here. So despite her clumsy words I am thankful to that planned giving professional for opening my eyes to some better planning. I’m not saying she will get any money, but you never know. I hope her organization will have to wait a long time to find out.

No Nuns were Harmed in the Writing of This Blog

After a wonderful breakfast outdoors in the cool Connecticut morning with my friends Karen and Stori eventually they had to get on the road to head home.  After our heartfelt goodbyes from a great reunion weekend I headed off to Bradley International Airport.  I arrived with lots of time to wait so I thought I would circle the terminals to get my steps.  It had been a low step weekend even though last night I did my best to dance up a lot of steps at the Ba Na Na Na – the traditional EWS dance party.

It turns out Bradley is a crap airport to walk in.  There is only one terminal with two little short legs and not much room to walk.  After making three passes of the route I decided I was drawing too much attention to myself from the many TSA agents so I settled into a rocking chair.

After pulling out my needlepoint I was suddenly I was surrounded by many middle aged and older elegant women who all seemed to resemble Barbara Billingsly, the Beaver’s mom from Leave it to Beaver.  Turns out that Smith College had a reunion this weekend too.  After a few rows of stitching, another group of women came along and joined the Smith women and me at the rocking chairs.  This group was not quite as elegant, but they were all as well behaved as the elegant alumnae around me since they were Nuns.

I learned by doing my favorite airport activity, eavesdropping, that many of the Smith women and all of the Nuns were going to be on my first flight to Baltimore.  Hooray, a flight of quite, well behaved, thin passengers with a good connection with the guy who might ensure we would arrive in one piece.

As the Southwest gate agent called us to line up I took my number 4 position in line.  Being early on the flight where we get to pick our own seats I chose an emergency exit row seat for the extra legroom.  Then the game began of other passengers coming down the aisle assessing which seat they would take.  I silently prayed to get one of the Smith ladies or at least a tiny Nun.  No luck.  The largest man in a red spider t-shirt that barley covered his nine-mouth pregnant like stomach sat right next to me.

When I was much fatter the fat people would not sit with me.  See, fat people want to sit next to thin people so they can co-opt some of their space.  If they sit next to an already seated fat person they don’t have the same opportunity.  Now that I am normal size I guess I have become a target for the space grabbers.  It was a good thing I had a little extra legroom because the pregnant man instantly fell asleep and spread out all his limbs in his sleep as well as his mouth with breath that could have made one of the Nuns swear out loud.  I think I need to wear all my clothes at the same time next time I get on a plane so that I appear larger and scare off the space steeling fat people. So much for the end of my great reunion weekend.

My Fourth Dimension

I was going to post a cantaloupe soup recipe today, but then I was over whelmed with kind messages about yesterday’s blog and I feel a response is required. I love getting comments on my blog and I don’t usually reply to the wordpress, facebook, words with friends, texted or e-mailed comments. I feel like everyone hears enough from me and just because I don’t write back a personal message to each one of you does not mean that I am not touched, moved or appreciative of the kind words you send me. I’m really grateful that most of the time you readers get my jokes and don’t hold me accountable for health, interpersonal or other advice that requires a doctor or professional. This blog is my therapy and should just be entertainment, inspiration or a “what’s for dinner” guide.

I don’t post before and after pictures of myself often because I am not fishing for compliments and this journey is not as simple as how I look. If I really wanted to shock you I would post pictures from eleven years ago when I weighed 135 pounds more than I do now.

For more of my life than not I have been fat, but I never felt like I was fat. I was a regular sized person carrying around a fat body. Today at Mah Jongg my friend Christy, who has known me for thirteen years and seen me regularly that whole time said, “I looked at the picture on your blog yesterday and I don’t remember you ever looking like that.” Now she is a true friend because I either looked like that or fatter than that more of the time she has known me than not.

The thing about just looking at a picture is you are only seeing a two dimensional vision of the person and we are all four-dimensional, the 3-d physical being and the 4^th being the soul. Since Christy is a friend I think she remembers the fourth dimension of me and not just the physical. I think there is a kind of friend blindness where we see the good in people we love and tend to block out the bad. For that I am thankful.

My message today is don’t worry about getting older, having a few extra pounds, wrinkles, gray hair or no hair. Chances are the people who love you still love you no matter what and they may not notice, certainly not the way you notice yourself. People love you for your kindness, warmth, generosity and I hope in my case, sense of humor. So thanks for the kind words yesterday and today. Keep the messages coming. If you want to make me really happy just tell me I made you laugh, not that I look good. Looks will come and go, but laughter is forever.

Shockingly Less Dana, More Good Celebrates Second Anniversary

2, 95, 103, 734… The number of years I have had this blog, the number of pounds I have lost in the last two years, the number of countries that have visited this blog (With the exception of the top five countries the rest have to be by accident) and the number of blog posts I have made ( I apparently posted four more posts than actually days because I had so much to say).

Two years ago today I sent out an e-mail inviting friends to log into this new blog. On the site was a video asking for pledges to the Food Bank of Central and Eastern NC for every pound I could lose by November 1, 2012. I had 744 views on the blog that day. I certainly did not send the e-mail out to seven hundred people, but I’m sure based on the numbers, people could not believe I was doing this weight loss challenge and had to watch the video multiple times.

A weight loss challenge for myself has been the most successful way for me to stick to a diet. I had done this before and lost 137 pounds and raised $48,000. The problem was that I gained over ninety pounds back over six years. The math on that is that I basically gained a little more than half an ounce a day. It certainly was easier to gain half an ounce than it was to lose.

During this last challenge I lost 53 pounds and raised $53,000 — more money per pound than the first one. That was great for the Food Bank and great for me, but I was still a long way from the weight I wanted to be. So without any money on the line I kept the blog portion of my challenge and worked on losing the weight just for myself.

Except for two days when I was too sick to lift a finger to the keyboard and write I posted a blog on this site everyday. My sweet husband and daughter posted things on those sick days so that I never missed posting in 730 days. I have to say that this very public accountability has been the difference. I think I have changed my eating habits to something I can live with. I certainly have changed my exercise routines.

I spend about twenty minutes everyday writing this blog, I think it is time well spent to be mindful. I am thankful for the people who follow me, encourage me, laugh with me, make fun of me, celebrate with me, cry with me, share their stories with me and inspire me. I am not at my resting place yet. So it’s the start of year three of Less Dana.

I know so well how a half an ounce a day on the plus side can get out of control. I am not looking for a half an ounce a day on the minus side for much longer, but what I do know is that very few days are even, most are plus or minus. It takes keen awareness and honesty with one’s self to stay on an even keel. I want to thank all you readers because you are my balance. Without you reading this blog I never would have gotten to where I am today and I am counting on you to keep me heading in the right direction. Thanks for the two years, I will try and keep you entertained in the next year.

Mother’s Day Amends

All the occasions that center around me happen in a eight-day period. First is our wedding anniversary followed the next day by my birthday and a few days later mother’s day. It can make for a really good week or a disappointment that I have to wait another year for my time to come around.

Last weekend for my birthday Carter wrote me a heartfelt letter. Yes, that is about all I ever really want. Flowers can die and fade away, and never should I ever be given candy or treats, but a letter I can read and reread especially when I need a pick me up, so it’s a good thing.

Since I got a letter for my birthday and Russ got my breakfast in bed this morning I was sure that Mother’s day would go unnoticed by the person in my house to whom I am an actual mother. I don’t come from a big tradition of honoring mothers. Heck, I just sent my mother a card and called and left her a message on the phone.

That is why I was caught off guard when Carter gave me an envelope. On the outside was written, “Mommy, Happy Mother’s Day! Thanks for the womb and board! And everything else you do for me! I love you! Baby Bug.” It was a lot of exclamation points, but the best part was that it was funny. A good pun goes a long way with me.

I was expecting another heartfelt letter, one that her father had reminded her to write. Then I opened the envelope to find the only real gift I ever want, a gift certificate to Chapel Hill Needlepoint. “I bought it with my own money, “ Carter told me. Her father confirmed that part.

What a surprise, a good joke and a real gift. I started to feel guilty about the just funny card I had sent my mother, with a couple of sentences, not even a whole heart felt letter. My fifteen year old had shown me up. So here is my open letter to my mother.

Dear Mom,

I hope you had a good day and that your two other children did more for you on Mother’s day than your first born. I know that I have not always been the perfect off spring and for everything I ever did that made you mad, embarrassed or sad I am sorry.

I know I don’t say it enough, but thanks for being my Mom. Despite the jokes I make you had to do some things right because I have never gone to jail, killed anyone that I know about or been banned from entering a foreign country. I know that leaves a lot of leeway, but I think I turned out OK, even if it took some 53 years to get here.

Mom, I think that the next 20 years you will see continued improvement in me so I hope that you can consider me a long-term project that eventually turned out the way you wanted.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Your Doodle Bug

To all you mother’s out there I hope you had a great day and that someone acknowledged all the hard work you do for your kids. If you have a mother and have not done anything it’s not too late, a heartfelt e-mail and a good pun go a long way. Go on and steal from Carter and thank her for the “Womb and board,” I’m sure your Mom does not read this blog.

Baby Food

I like having friends of all different ages. It is always helpful to have someone who has been through a stage of life I am in to help give me perspective or advice and then turn around and do the same for someone else.

Today my great friend Jan who moved to Texas four years ago was up visiting and taking care of her 15 month old granddaughter, Elliott. Since Jan is doing the Grandmother thing I asked her to come over for a walk to lunch play date with E. Although I am a long way off from the Grandmother stage it was so fun to play with a baby.

I feel like Jan and I have come full circle because I have known her since before Carter was born. It seems like yesterday that I used to roll Carter in her stroller into the darkened locker room of Hope Valley where she would sleep while Jan, Roz, Judy and I would play Mah Jongg in the ladies card room.   Jan’s kids were in elementary school then and now one is married and the other is getting married next month.

Elliott is a happy baby. She has two dogs of her own so she was totally cool meeting Shay Shay who was most intrigued with this little person. I was happy Shay did not think to look where the squeaker was on Elliott. After some play time with the dog Jan and E and I set out on a meandering walk to lunch.

Things have changed in the baby eating world since I had Carter. First Jan had a disposable stick down placemat that covered the public table that had who knows what germs. Then she began the breaking up of the crunchy section of the meal. E really likes teddy grahams, but they must have their tiny little ears and legs broken off and then their bodies and head quartered so they are baby bite sized, smaller than half a kernel of corn. I helped with the breaking, but found that I was better at making graham dust than bite sized pieces.

Elliot was an expert at picking up each tiny crumb and popping it in her mouth. Me, with my aging eyesight could hardly see the actual the tiny teddies. Jan told me that Elliot was very particular about what she liked to eat and to demonstrate she pinched off two tiny bits of bread from her sandwich and added them to the pile of teddy chunks we had made when E was not watching. Not one second later did Elliot pick up one of the bits of bread and without any fanfare drop it on the floor since it certainly was not a teddy graham. She quickly found the second piece of bread and did the same.

Then came the wet portion of the meal, a squeeze tube of amaranth, zucchini and banana.   Jan and I both decided that baby food had changed a lot since we had our babies because we did not even know what amaranth was. I guessed it was a grain and Jan confirmed I was right as she read the description on the package, “An ancient grain that pairs well with the zing of zucchini and the sweetness of banana.” Obviously the copywriter at the baby food company was counting on the fact that baby’s don’t read descriptions since I have never encountered a zingy zucchini in its natural state in my life.

E. loved the stuff in the tube, but when Jan offered her a bit of bacon she spit, wiped, waved and demanded that the offending pork product be removed from her being. An avocado was not met with any greater love.

I guess they have made baby food too good because it is dwarfing the appeal of bacon. I can remember that Carter’s first solid food was some horrible rice cereal. Then one day we gave her some bacon and she looked at me like, “Why the hell have you been giving me that damn cereal when this stuff exists in the world?”

I’m sure that by the time I am a grandmother things will change again. Who knows what format babies will want food in then, but I can pretty much guarantee that zucchini will still not be zingy all on it’s own, no matter what the package says.

Do I Need Three Daily Constitutionals?

Today my friend Sara wanted to do something to celebrate my birthday so we took a walk to a local spot for lunch. We were lucky that the humidity was low even though it was warm so we did not get too sweaty to eat lunch at a place with people who were not exercising right before dining.

It was the perfect guilt free way to commemorate my birthday; nice walk, good friend, healthy lunch, great conversation and post merriment walk back. It got me thinking that I should have to walk to all my meals. Not that it would increase the amount I walk in a day, but that I think it makes me more mindful of my eating.

Mindless eating is an issue I think I have overcome after two years of writing this blog. I started by vowing not to eat in the car. I feel like the advent of the drive thru restaurant, and I use the term restaurant very loosely here, is the downfall of the American civilization. We should not have such easy access to unhealthy and fattening food. Drive thru raw vegetable stands are fine, but for French fries we should have to climb a mountain or jump over thirty hurdles before being served a small bag.

Also eating while driving does not give your stomach a chance to register that you are eating at all. Our mind really is on the driving, or at least I hope it is. I think it is best if we enjoy our food with another human being. This is not always possible for me, but I do notice I eat much more slowly when I have someone to talk with during a meal. I do have the terrible habit of eating my breakfast in front of TV while a small dog sits at the ready to drink the milk from my bowl. I don’t think eating with Shay counts as a dining companion.

Sara has been a great friend and avid follower of my blog and weight loss progress. She asked me what my plan was when I reached my goal for keeping the weight off. Since I have lost and gained weight so many times the maintenance part is the most important and difficult task. The one thing I know is that accountability is my best friend. I don’t anticipate changing much of anything.

I certainly can’t add sugar back to my life. I still will need to exercise the same amount. White flour is still a foe. Mostly, I will still need to write my blog everyday. Knowing that there are people all around me with their eyes on me has been the biggest helper to my keeping on track. This is all very easy to say while I still have a few more pounds I want to drop, or a couple of items in my closet that still don’t quite fit.

It seems that if I hover right above my goal and never quite reach it I will stay the course, but then there is the part of me that wants to reach my goal and see if I am able to maintain. Perhaps I should add walking to or before and after every meal. When I get really sick of eating at the places that are close by I might reach my goal because I make myself walk downtown for lunch. Of course I might end up only having time for one meal a day by the time I reach lunch, eat it and walk home.

What’s That Flapping Sound?

People who know I walk 20,000 steps a say have asked me if I ever considered running. I laugh. When I was 28 I had a bad moped accident in Greece and the stateside Ortho Doc told me the good news was I would recover from my hip dislocation, broken leg and broken arm, but that I would never run again. I told him I could not run before so I was even. Running is not in my cards, but the good news is I have not worn out any knees or hips.

I have to admit that all this walking and weight loss has made it easier to run on the odd occasion when I am trying to catch a run-away dog or chasing the recycling truck down the street because I was late in rolling my cart to the curb. The other day I took Shay Shay out for a walk and it was much colder than I had anticipated. In my underdressed state Shay decided she needed a long walk before she would submit to her business.

When she finally decided she was done it started to drizzle, as we were three streets away from home. The cold rain was not helping my situation since I was only wearing a t-shirt and it was about 50 degrees out. Shay also is a bit of a princess and does not like to get wet. I am sure the lab part of her was bred way out and this is a poodle trait. If only Shay realized that a little spritzing of her curly coat improves her look a lot.

With my small dog pulling on her leash we both started to run to get home. Now Shay can out run me any day, but having her tug at me certainly helped get me up to speed and stay there for a good three minutes. Since I was able to run that distance without panting I noticed a different sound, something like flapping. I looked to the sky to see if a large hawk was flying overhead, but saw nothing. That is when I realized the flapping was my own flabby body parts slapping against myself.

Before you blame my large breasts I will tell you I had on my most supportive sports bra, so I ruled out the most likely flapping culprit. That left three potential perpetrators, my stomach, my thighs or the underside of my upper arms. I stopped running very abruptly and practically choked my dog to death as the leashed pulled against her collar. The flapping sound stopped.

Since I have no way to isolate one flapping flabby area from the other I am not sure I will ever identify exactly who caused the terrible sound, but what I do know is the Doctor’s prediction that I will never run again was not exactly true. Instead I should only run with deaf people because the hearing runner will be thrown off stride if they run with me because they will keep ducking and looking to the sky to avoid the large bird of prey that most certainly is flying along with us.

Birthday Guilt

Boy, am I going to have birthday guilt come tomorrow. I just had afternoon tea at the Fearington House and let loose of all healthy ways to celebrate my big day, and this is just the beginning. We still have dinner tonight and brunch. If I were Catholic I would be headed to confession.

One of the best things about Russ is one of the worst things. He is so busy with work that he does not plan celebrations far in advance. That leads him to go so much bigger because it is last minute. So a night at the Fearington House with a massage and flowers and the decadent eating. He wanted to do more but the front desk told him yesterday this was all they could fit in since most everyone else who comes for the weekend plans their trips far in advance. They don’t know Russ. The other thing about him is that once he has given me a gift I love he somehow thinks he needs to give me that gift again, year after year, but then he wants to do something new so the number of gifts keeps growing. I am totally spoiled.

It has been a great birthday this year, especially since it is not a big number. It started last week with my friend Donnabeth taking me to lunch. Then Hannah had a lunch at her house to celebrate my and Michelle’s birthdays. Yesterday my Mom came and took me to lunch and last night Renee organized drinks at the club for the May birthday gang. De showed up with a darling orchid for me. Sadly Beth Sholtz who shares my birthday was not there because of a last minute issue. Suzanne sent a gorgeous hydrangea yesterday and Carter thought it dwarfed the beautiful orchid Russ sent. I am continuing the parties next week with lunch with Shelayne and Susan Monday.

Facebook has totally changed birthdays because so many friends are reminded it’s your day and send kind messages. As far as I am concerned it is the best use of Facebook.
I used to hate birthdays because I selfishly thought the day did not live up to the hype. Not now. It could not have been a better day and it is not over yet.

Besides my friend Beth it is also my friends Gussy, Tricia and Cousin Sarah’s birthday. Happy birthday to all of you. Some years are better than others and I hope that you all have your best year yet.

I am not as good as Russ at celebrating other people’s birthday. I want to keep hold of how great this day has been and make sure that I honor my friends and family on their big days in a way that makes them this happy. I just can’t break my diet this way on any other day but my own birthday or I will cut short the number of birthdays I have.

Happy May Third to all of you. Go out and celebrate, it’s my birthday.