One More Quilt
Posted: June 30, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 4 CommentsThere is not much my mother needs or wants, but she does love the quilts I make her. She wants a quilt that coordinates with the painting above her bed. She told my sister Janet that is all she wanted in life, another quilt. My sister’s response to her was, “Good luck with that.” Janet knows how busy I am and how long it takes for me to make a quilt.
My mother is 85. She may only look 65, but still I know she is 85. So when she asked me if I would make her yet another a quilt, what could I say but, “yes.”
I had purposely taken two weeks off from teaching around the forth of July so I could get some things done around the house. Now these two weeks are filled with my working on this quilt.

It will take me much longer than two weeks, but at least I have a good block of time to get the foundation of the quilt done. Russ and Carter are off in Bucks County visiting Russ’ family. So I cut and sew and figure out exactly how many blocks I need.
So much for projects around the house. At 85 I am not sure how many more quilts my mother is going to need. I have already made her three others. When she gets to 90 and says all she wants is one more quilt I am going to put my foot down, but not until she is 90.
My Visit on the Mah Jongg Mondays Podcast
Posted: June 29, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 Comment
Proof that Mah Jongg is exploding is the existence of so many Mah Jongg related media experiences. A few weeks ago I got a message from Fern Bernstein, a podcaster with a long running show called Mah Jongg Mondays. Truth be told, I have never listened to a Mah Jongg Podcast, so I did not know Fern or her show.
She called and interviewed me for an hour and after I passed that test she asked if I would be a guest on her show. We all know I can easily talk for an hour about Mah Jongg. We taped the show last week. Fern sent me a link to the podcast as it went live today.
I listened to it today and my big take away is that I say, “absolutely” way too much. Perhaps I don’t say it in regular conversation that much, but while talking with another Mah Jongg expert I had a lot to agree with her about. She was a delightful person and I loved talking about the game, pet peeves about the National Mah Jongg League and some tips and tricks for players of all levels.
What I learned about Fern is that she is just coming out of Cancer treatment and so is her 25 year old son. God bless them. I can’t imagine what that does to your family, but I do feel like Mah Jongg has been a positive force in her life and she was a delight to talk with.
If you are interested in listening here is the link to the Podcast Mah Jongg Mondays.
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mah-jongg-mondays-podcast/id1500813737?i=1000618717441
Travel Craziness
Posted: June 28, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentRuss went to DC for the day yesterday. Well, supposedly for the day. He texted me from DCA late in the afternoon. “Looks like my flight is delayed by at least two hours.”
Two hours turned into five when they finally proclaimed his flight canceled. His original airline had no available seat for today or the the next day. As it was late he was spending the night in DC no matter what. Russ looked into plans to rent a car for this morning, then got a message that his airline had found him a seat on a different airline.
The new plan was to fly out of DCA at 8:30AM to Greensboro. Sit in the Greensboro airport all day and then fly to Charlotte and then fly to RDU and get home tonight at 11:35 tonight. What kind of craziness is that.
So Russ flew the flight to Greensboro this morning and I drove over to pick him up and drove him back to RDU to pick up his car. Thankfully I was home this week and could do that.
If you are flying anywhere this summer the theme needs to be flexibility. You just don’t know what is going to happen. If you need medication always being a couple extra day’s with you. And it never hurts to have extra underwear in you bag. Not that Russ follows these rules, but the rest of you travelers might want to consider them.
I’m just happy Russ was not on that Delta flight, which landed inCharlotte without it’s front landing gear down. Great job from that pilot who put that thing down so carefully.
As they used to say on Hills Street Blues, “Be careful out there.”
No Idea How Much Time We Have
Posted: June 27, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a comment
Today I opened my IPad and a movie popped up from my last reunion at Walkers. The first photo was of me and Nancy and Stori. It’s been nine months since we lost Stori and this photo hit me hard.the fact that Stori lived in Massachusetts meant I only saw her about once a year, but I heard from her daily through Facebook. She was always quick to comment on my blog or send a heart to a posted photo.
When I was at my college reunion a few weeks ago memories of my roommate Lauren, who lost her battle with breast cancer twenty years ago, were close to the surface for me. I somehow had magical thinking that these most cherished friends would be with me for my whole life.
Losing people who were such important friends means those shared stories and memories is now a one-sided conversation.
The photo with Stori reminds me to tell my close friends and family how important they are to me and often. None of us know when that last conversation is going to take place.
To those of you who I share many happy moments together who might be reading this, I want to see you, talk with you or communicate in someway to tell you I love you.
What’s In My Chopped Basket?
Posted: June 26, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentIn less than two month we will be in Maine. That means I have got to make the most of my garden until then. I still don’t have ripe tomatoes, but I have had a lot of zucchini, green beans and cucumbers. So I am having to get creative with those.

I have another goal to eat as much out of our freezer and pantry as we can before we go. There is nothing so heart breaking as having the electricity go out while you are away and coming home to a bunch of spoiled frozen food. There is a good trick to know if this happens. You freeze a small plastic container of water and once it is frozen you place a penny on top of the ice. If the freezer ever looses temperature the ice will melt and the penny will sink. You would never know if the food spoiled if the electricity came back on, except that the penny is no longer on top of the ice.
I have all kinds of great things in the freezer, but we often forget about them. Today I took out a big circle of hot Italian sausage. I cooked it up to use in my zucchini creation. I used pesto from the freezer, half a bag of orzo from the pantry and a can of tomatoes. Two onions and some cheese and I have made some kind of zucchini bake. I hope Russ likes it since I made a big pan.
It is going to be an interesting summer of mash up meals. Sometimes the best things I make come from the challenge of using what I have on hand. Like the Food Network Show, Chopped, where the contestants have to make a dish with the disparate ingredients in a random basket I consider this my summer of Chopped.
Create Create
Posted: June 25, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentI am laying low today. So I binged Jury Duty on Amazon Prime and needlepointed. I consider that a good day. I am about two-thirds done with my first seat cover. The goal is to finish before the middle of August. I need to start designing the second seat so I can order the right fibers before I leave for Maine.

My mother has requested a new quilt to go in her bedroom at Croasdaile. I am to take my inspiration from one of her abstract painting that hangs above her bed. This is going to eat into my needlepoint time, but I have not made a quilt this year and was thinking I needed some time in the sweat shop.

So many fibers to create, so little time.
Some How Your Body Knows
Posted: June 24, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentWe were supposed to go to the beach this weekend, but our plans got changed. So we were invited in the last minute to go to the mountains. I declined. I guess somewhere in my inside I knew I needed the weekend to recover.
I woke up at three in the morning feeling bad and did not go back to sleep until 6:30. Then I slept until 9:30. I laid around until noon when the guilt got me so I mopped the kitchen floor.
That about did me in. I am achy in my top half. I laid around the rest of the day and evening. I finished rewatching Ted Lasso and cried at the end like I did last month when I saw the last episode. I feel like I could rewatch the whole thing again. Well, once I feel better.
Not sure what is wrong with me. I did a Covid test and it is negative. I hope that whatever my body is fighting that is making me feel bad is solved soon. I am getting bored.
Our Four Legged Meteorologist
Posted: June 23, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentThose emergency alerts have nothing on Shay. She can sense bad weather coming well before any computer. Today Shay bearded me into my bedroom so she could snuggle up to me on her home base, our bed.

The poor thing was shivering like she had been locked in a freezer. I put a heavy blanket on top of her and that helped slow the shiver from a level five earth quake to a 2, but shiver she still did.
After a while I could start to hear car off thunder. Then slowly the terrific storm got closer and closer u til 5e deluge was upon us. Before it end the shivering stop, which signaled to me that the storm must be moving on. Sure enough two minutes later the rain stopped.
Shay is a highly sensitive weather dog. I wish things like the thunder shirt worked on her. Only being on home base does anything and then she still wants one of her humans. Poor thing thinks we can protect her and we can’t. I am not going to burst her bubble. I’m just glad she is better than any weather radio.
From Pod Cast To Mom Cast
Posted: June 22, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentAfter a fabulous long night’s sleep, which I needed so badly. I awoke to the anticipation of a fun and different day. This morning I was being interviewed by Fran Bernstein for her Pod Cast Mah Jongg Mondays.
I had a wonderful hour talking with Fern about all things Mah Jongg. We had similar takes on the National Mah Jongg League and how to play three handed Mah Jongg. She told me the episode will be released next week and I will let you know when it does if you are interested in listening to it. I had not listened to Fran before, but since I have gotten to know her I certainly will.

After I was done yacking, I picked my Mom up for a fun day out to needlepoint and lunch. My Mom originally just wanted arugula from my green, but quickly took me up on a lunch out and a little shopping. We started out stopping at Chapel Hill Needlepoint to see Nancy. Mom wanted to talk with her about future pillow finishing.
I sat patiently waiting for Mom to finish talking about something that was not going to happen for months. Finally I couldn’t wait any longer and said, “Can we please get to why I came and see my purse that is finished?”

Nancy went to the back and had me close my eyes while she took it out of the plastic bag so I could see my Nantucket Basket purse in all it’s glory. I was thrilled with the finishing. It was such a boring canvas to stitch, but such a perfect purse to have. I had added rows onto the original canvas to make it a little taller to ensure that my phone would fit inside. My phone has room to spare, which is good since phones keep getting bigger.
After visiting with Nancy Mom and I went to the Carolina Inn for a lovely lunch. She treated which was a big surprise. So I took her to Trader Joe’s on the way back to Croasdaile and I treated. We had such a fun day, and I brought her a bag of arugula from the garden since that was the impetus for the whole event.
What a different day from the norm. It’s fun to change things up. Now I just need someplace to go to wear my new purse.
Hit The Wall
Posted: June 21, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentIn the last two weeks I have gone to Texas, Pennsylvania, the coast and mountains of North Carolina. With the exception of Texas, I have driven to all those places. I’m exhausted.

Today I finished up Mountain Mah Jongg. It was a wonderful group, who sadly I only got a picture of half of them. When the lessons finished I bade farewell to my dear friend Michelle and her son Davis and I made the drive home. I finished listening to my great book The Covenant of Water about an hour from home. I realized I was dun worn out from driving as I hit the proverbial wall.
Thankfully I was able to tough it out and get home to snuggle with Shay. I am in great need of my break in the next week. Russ and I were supposed to go to the beach this weekend and our trip got canceled. I think there was the hand of God in that because I don’t think I could make another trip so soon.
For now I am going to crash, in my bed that is. Wishing you all a restful evening.
Mah Jongg Mountain Style
Posted: June 20, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentI’m in one of the most beautiful places on earth, not that I can see it. Today started Roaring Gap Mah Jongg camp. Two intense days of beginner Mah Jongg.
I got up early to make the drive up the mountain to Roaring Gap. I’ve made this drive countless times since Carter went to camp here and worked at camp here for most of her talking years.
This trip is courtesy of Michelle Beischer who gathered her friends to learn with her as well as generously host me. As a bonus her youngest son David is here for a few days.
The bad news is that the weather is especially awful. I drove up the mountain and could barley find the Inn thanks to the worse than any London fog. It was pouring so the golf course was more like a water park.
It was really the perfect day to be stuck inside learning Mah Jongg because there was nothing else you could do. After a day of learning Michelle and I were forced to needlepoint because we could not take a walk before dinner.
Getting to the lake club to have dinner was it’s own adventure. Davis drove practically by feel since there way no way to see the road, especially without any lines painted on them. Mary Lee from Durham and her daughter Sydney as well as one other Mah Jongg student Martha and her family joined us for dinner. There was one small moment when the fog on the lake lifted and I took a picture. Then five minutes later you could not see the dock just outside the window.

As we were leaving the lake club to inch our way back to Michelle’s we met a couple who had just arrived. As we were talking the woman and I discovered that we had grown up seven houses apart from each other in Wilton, CT in about 15 of the same years. We belonged to the same club, knew the same neighbors, but since we are about six years apart in age we did not know each other then. It’s just a small world.
Michelle, Davis and I have stayed up too late talking. Michelle dictated a suggestion for a three word blog, since I am exhausted, but I had to tell the whole day’s story. Finally I will sleep to be ready to continue Mountain Mah Jongg tomorrow. Pray for dry weather.
You Can’t Learn Mah Jongg in Three Hours
Posted: June 19, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a comment
Last week I had some students in my advanced Beginner class who were very new players. They were very smart young women who had not taken beginner Mah Jongg from me. They had taken from someone who offered a class that amounted to three hours to learn how to play the whole game.
In all due respect to whomever this teacher is, a group of people can’t learn to play Mah Jongg well in three hours. When I teach Mah Jongg the first three hours are dedicated to learning the tiles, how to read the card and assemble hands. After 25 years of teaching I have come to know that the hardest thing to learn is how to read the card and identify possible hands. The more someone understands that right up front the faster they will master the game.
Skimping on learning the basics means it takes you ten times longer to become a proficient player. One needs to practice the game basics with a teacher guiding you if you are going to be able to play on your own with any confidence.
Don’t try and take short cuts. Learn from someone who is willing to put in the time to teach you in a systematic way. Sitting next to an experienced player does not mean you will absorb how to play. There are too many rules and exceptions to rules to learn that way.
Plan on a good nine hours of investment to just understand the basics of the game. After you have those down, play as much as you can. Practice is the key, then you will be ready to learn more advanced concepts.
Proof Positive Russ is a Great Father
Posted: June 18, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentFathers are important. I was very lucky to have a father who believed in me. He was tough, funny, inspiring, daunting, and generous. He demanded a lot, but was always my biggest supporter. Heaven forbid I cried about something. No mercy or tenderness from him then, just the demand, “stop crying.”

Unlike the stereotype that you marry your father, I married the kindest man who is the best father to Carter. He too is generous and inspiring, but also kind.
Good fathers teach their daughters important lessons about how to be themselves in the world. If you have a supportive father you know that who you are is good enough and that staying true to yourself is vital.
I am thankful to the father’s in my life. I miss my own father, it know that all that was good about him lives on in his daughters and grand daughter and all that was difficult about him is just a fading memory. I am most thankful for the father that Russ has been. All that Carter has accomplished is in no small part due to how he parented her through the years. Her core values shine through thanks to the foundation laid out by her father.

So happy Father’s Day to Russ. I knew when we picked each other you were destined to be one great father. Thankfully Carter proved me right.
Who Makes These Signs?
Posted: June 17, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentOn my drive home from Carlisle, PA last Sunday I stopped at a state rest stop in Timberville, Virginia. I entered the ladies room stall and shut the door only to be met with two signs.

“Protect your valuables, hang on purse hook” followed by “Purse Hooks” and then one hook.
I can only say that men must write these signs because I am certain a women would never write these.
First, if there is a hook women think, “Thank God, because then I don’t have to try and hold my purse in my naked lap while I pee.” We see a hook in the middle of the door an just know it is the place to hang a purse or anything else.
The way the top sign is written it sounds like we should hang on the purse hook. No where does it actually say, “Hang your purse on this hook.” My valuables are my family and my dog. I don’t want to hang them on any hook, let alone a purse hook. But for some people their purse does contain their valuables and the advice of hanging your purse half way down the door is good since no one can reach over the door and steal your purse.
The way the sign reads it sounds like I can protect valuables not even with me in the stall if I hang on the hook. Imagine that?
On this particular door the only hook was the one half way down the door so there was little need for the sign telling your it was “Purse Hooks” which was grammatically incorrect since it was a singular hook.
I know we need signs for the impaired, like those who spill hot coffee in their laps as they drive away from McDonalds having just bought hot coffee, but really state of Virginia you can save yourself at least one sign. Yes, it is safer to hang your purse in the middle of the door and good on you for offering a purse hook, but trust us, we women know what to hang there.
I might bring a totally invaluable plastic bag into the ladies room and I will still hang it on that hook because not one lady wants to touch anything after it sat on the floor of a road side rest stop ladies room.
The purse hook sign would have made more sense if there had also been a coat hook on the back of the door near the top. Then you might want a sign differentiating the two hooks. Not the case here. If I was wearing a long coat I would have had to throw it over the top of the door or hang it on the purse hook where it would have touched to floor. If it touched the floor I might as well just throw it away right there in the ladies room because I do not want to ut that coat on my body after it touched the public bathroom floor at a state run rest stop in rural Virginia. No offense Virginia, but I don’t want my coat to touch the floor in any public bathroom.
I worry about people who make signs for a living not thinking through all the possibilities of meaning for their signs. If I had a pocket full of cash, which is valuable to me, it is best to leave it in my pocket and not try and hang it anywhere. If I was wearing an expensive ring, it is safer on my finger than hanging on the purse hook. I know people are stupid, I’ve seen the interviews done at political rallies. So let’s not put up signs which proves how stupid people are, either the sign makers or the person trying to hang themselves on the hook thinking it will protect their valuables.
Beans, Beans Good For Your Heart
Posted: June 16, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentYou have never had green beans until you have grown them yourself and eaten them within the hour of harvesting them. As my Dad’s cleaning lady Bertha used to say, “I’m tellin’ you.” Those green beans are like candy. Even the most veggie hating eight year old would clamor to eat one of these beauties.

Growning green beans is incredibly easy. You buy dried beans and poke a hole one inch deep in the soil. Place the bean in the hole and cover it up. Water. Wait six weeks and you have beans.
I am growning bush beans, as opposed to pole beans. Bush beans are sweet and tender, but the plant produces all the beans it is going to all at once. You so harvest and then when you are sure no more beans are coming you pull the plant out and start again. I planted five rows of six plants. I planted one row a week so that I will have a succession of beans, rather than getting a ton all at once.
I am happy I did it that way so we can have fresh beans every three days until we go to Maine. I am not sure I can eat store bought beans, or even farmers market beans again.
Damn You NYT Games
Posted: June 15, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentJust when I thought I had my game addiction under control, the New York Times comes out with a new game- Tiles. They call it a matching motifs game. I call it pattern recognition.

The game has a grid of various tiles, that look a like like quilt squares to me. In each tile there are a few elements, like a pink flower or a white square. You have to find to matching elements and when you do they disappear. It is a very addictive game, but one I highly recommend as pattern recognition is one of the skills that builds new neural path ways.
These are skills I use all the time so mastering the game is not hard, but still fun. Unlike wordle I have not found a limit as to how much I can play this game. Seems like NYT needs to put some kind of governor on the game otherwise I will not bother reading the news.
I guess the Times really doesn’t care if I read the news or not as long as I pay for it. Tiles is just one more thing to keep me paying. Seriously if you haven’t played it, check it out. I think it might be free. I can’t tell since I pay for the Times.
Beat The Teacher Night
Posted: June 14, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentAfter a full day of two Mah Jongg classes. Marty and I went back to Coral Bay for dinner with Kim and Mary Clark. Seemed like every woman in the dining room had taken Mah Jongg from me at some point. It was fun to see so many friends, although it made exiting the club slow.

Kim, Mary Clark and I all went back to Marty’s to play a little Mah Jongg because that is what you do when you have the mah Jongg teacher in your guest room. Kim was a nervous wreck, which she had no reason to be as she did a great job in class today. She won the first game and beat me by a mile.

Mary Clark beat me the second game in record time. There is nothing better than beating the teacher. They accused me of letting them win, which I assured them I would never do. It does make me proud when they beat me.
The Kindness of Marty
Posted: June 13, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 9 CommentsTwo years ago Marty Peterson took Mah Jongg class from me at the beach. Afterwards she casually asked me, “Would you come to Raleigh to teach, because I have a few friends who want to learn.”

A few friends is putting it mildly. Thanks to Marty I have taught at least 1,500 people just in Raleigh. Along the way Marty became a wonderful friend. She helped organize classes in the early days and eventually got me a regular gig at her club after much work. I owe so much to her.
As if that wasn’t enough, now she is hosting me at her beach house as I am doing my June Beach week. What a sweet heart. I so cherish Marty and appreciate her kindness, generosity and fun loving spirit. Marty has been the big bonus of teaching Mah Jongg. I am eternally grateful to her.

Tonight after we went to dinner I taught her to play Siamese Mah Jongg. “I don’t want to make you work,” she said. It is never working when I get to play Mah Jongg with you Marty!
Tell People What They Mean To You
Posted: June 12, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentI am not going to promise this is the last blog I am going to write about my 40th college reunion, but this is a universal message that comes from my reunion. It applies to your reunions, work life, family life and just your interactions with strangers sometimes.
On Saturday, while I was sitting around catching up with college friends at a gathering of all the people who were in my graduation class and a classmate, Becky, came up to me and said, “Hi, Dana. You are the only person I know here.”

Becky and I have only gotten to know each other thanks to my blog and our Facebook interactions. While in school we never lived in the same dorms, were not in the same classes or sororities, or clubs and really didn’t cross paths at school.
Becky continued, “This is the first reunion I have come back to and I wish I had a chance to do something over because I think we would have be been friends in college. I read you blog and think, ‘Wow, I feel exactly the same way.’”
First, for the record, Becky ended up being friends with everyone at the reunion. Second, the statement about wanting a do over so we could have been friends longer was very impactful to me. Telling people what they mean to you can be profound. For both the teller and the receiver. We just don’t do it enough.
All weekend this same scenario was repeated over and over again. When someone tells you in a heartfelt way that they have always loved you or that they feel like they are always connected to you, despite the fact that you don’t ever see each other is wonderful.
Reunions are too short. I spent some good quality time with some very close friends who I adore and they know they are important to me because we have kept in touch and will continue that. But there were lots of people I didn’t get enough time with to really tell them.
So many times I have had someone give me some life changing advice or do me a favor, or turn me on to something new and I don’t go back to them and tell them how impactful that interaction was. Sometimes I don’t remember until I am in the place where the situation happened. That’s why going to reunions are important because you are flooded with memories by being in the place where they were made.
So I am imploring you to be like Becky. Go to your reunions, feel the feelings and tell people what they mean to you, or just make new friends. I promise it will be the highlight of their day and yours as well.
Fifth Reunion Versus 40th Reunion
Posted: June 11, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentMy 40th college reunion is in the books. It was a record reunion with 89 officially back and at least another dozen who came back, but did bother to tell the college.
As I compare how this reunion was to our fifth reunion I found some distinct difference and some total similarities.
Both reunions were 48 hours of non-stop fun with only about eight hours sleep of those 48 hours. The main difference is it is going to take two or three days to recover from this one.

The best part about all reunions is reconnecting with old friends. As my friend Dave says, “We are only going to tell all the same old stories.” The reason we tell old stories is those are the ones in our long term memories. We can’t remember the stories of things that happened last week, but ask me about what we did freshman year and I can tell you a story about every weekend.
At fifth reunions you see who got thinner, who got fatter, who got married, who is pregnant, who is moving up the ladder, who doesn’t know what a ladder is. At 40th reunions you see who got thinner, who got fatter, who got a new hip, who got a new knee, who doesn’t have hair, who got divorced, who got remarried, who got a forth spouse, who has a grandchild, who has retired, and who knows that the ladder is the least important thing.

At fifth reunions you don’t need to look at people’s name tags, at the 40th you not only look at their name tag, you pick it up off their chest so you can see it better and then, introduce yourself. At all reunions to tell people what they meant to you, how you first met them or how they inspired you. At 40th reunions sometimes you have a recollection about someone and they still don’t know who you are, but you fake it better.
At fifth reunions you drink beer on Morgan Rocks and ask people to chip in. At 40 some drink beers, or wine, or seltzer or water, but thankfully no one needed ensure. At 40 you thank Sally, Britt and Nancy for providing all the drinks with out any fanfare. (Seriously we thank them for all the drinks!)

At fifth reunions you dance to the band Bradley in the Hub. At the 40th you dance to the band Bradley in the Hub, but when you get in bed that night you wonder why your Achilles tendons hurt. At fifth reunions you don’t need to stretch before dancing hard, at 40 you realize too late that you should have stretched before dancing so hard.
At fifth reunions you look at around at the 40th and 50th reunion attendees and think you see your Mom’s best friend. At the 40th you talk to the fifth reunion folks and find out they are friends with your kids.

At fifth reunions you rediscover why you loved these people in college and promise to keep better in touch. At 40 you know why you loved these people, the ones you can remember and discover new people because neither of you remember if you knew each other or not. At 5 you say see you soon, maybe a wedding or another reunion. At 40 you pray you will see these people at 45.
To all my Dickinson friends, the ones I still talk to everyday, the ones I just get Christmas cards from or Facebook comments and the ones I just got to know recently because our paths didn’t really intersect in college, but now I like you, thanks for making reunions a can’t miss occasion. See you all in five years if not before.
Halfway Through the 40th Dickinson Reunion
Posted: June 10, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentI’ve been back at Dickinson 24 hours and I already lost my voice, I’m dirty, and I desperately need a nap. So far, just like a normal day at Dickinson four decades ago. Yesterday I realized at midnight I had not posted a blog so I tried to post a photo. I was still hours away from bed, when I usually write my blog.

The majority of yesterday was spent at the G-man. Doug, Hugh and I got to there at five and two by two we were joined by more and more friends. I am too old to talk over the din of a bar anymore, but that didn’t stop us from telling a highlight reel of stories.

The biggest and best surprise for me was the arrival of Margaret, Joy and Johanna, my little sister and grand daughters from Pi Phi who were in the class two behind me. They came to the reunion to see me and be together even though it’s not their year. Today they were joined by Ginger making it a four of my favorite little sisters.

Slowly but surely we had to find designated drivers for some and by midnight we realized we had not eaten anything and wanted dinner. So Hugh, Doug and I walked down to the Milt to discover it no longer is open at midnight. My how things have changed. Turned out nothing in Carlisle is open after midnight despite Hugh trying to convince waitresses to reopen.
Doug and I dropped Hugh at his fancy Microtel and we were back to our Airbnb. We each went off into our own little rooms saying we must sleep. Well, there was no way my extrovertedness was going to allow me to sleep after so much human interaction.

I was up until 3, but true to form I woke up at 7:30. So much for recovery. As we had not eaten anything the day before we reworked our plans, and walked to Fay’s for breakfast. We skipped the Dickinson farm lunch and tour and went right to Morgan rocks where our class gathering was being held. Sally, Britt and Nancy had the drinks under control and I put out a cheese platter. Members of younger classes came by and asked if they could have our red Adirondack chairs and I said absolutely not, we were old and needed them. Which we did as we had an outstanding turnout.

The weather was perfect in the shade and I got to visit with so many old friends. Now I am getting a little lie down before our official class dinner which will be the only official reunion activity I am ending up making.

It is best for me to write my blog at nap time rather than bed time because who knows what day that will be. Reunion is killing me and I love it. I do wish Suzanne and Janet were here. They are sorely missed.
Last minute
Posted: June 10, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentI’m at my college 40th reunion and still at the gman. I’ll blog tomorrow
Read the rest of this entry »The Thing You Never knew You Needed
Posted: June 8, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentBy now anyone who actually knows me and even some of you who just read me, knows that I am anti more stuff. I accumulated more than enough in my first half and now don’t want to spend my time managing my stuff in my last half. The more I can simplify the less I have to dust. The more I can purge the clearer my world feels. Don’t get me wrong, I still have way too much stuff. I hold on to things that are in great shape, waiting for the right person to give them too or the best occasion to reuse them.
Case in point is my puzzle collection. I am good at sharing puzzles, so if you want to borrow one please stop by. My friend Jan and I both love puzzles and do trade back and forth.
Even though I am anti stuff that does not mean I am not in the market for some great tool or cool gadget, if it is something I will actually use. Today Jan came by with a birthday gift for me that was the twin of one she bought for herself. Jan is a world class shopper and early adaptor, finding the coolest and newest gadgets.
Jan prefaced the gift by saying this was the greatest thing she didn’t know she needed. I opened the gift bag and pulled out “the puzzle scoop.” It’s flat magnifier with a handle. The best part about it is that it lights up.

Jan said she was excited about it for the ability to scoop up combos of pieces she had already connected and moving them to the right place to connect them to the larger puzzle. Turned out that the bonus of the lit up magnifier was the real deal function of this tool.
This excited me to no end. I often am trying to find the right piece based on color matching, but if I don’t have perfect lighting I am thwarted. Now I will have light and magnification, Cha-Ching, Ching!
Thank you Jan for always spreading the love of just the right gadget! See, why do I ever need to shop ever again, as long as Jan is my friend?
Fort Worth Farewell
Posted: June 7, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 Comment
I have had three great days in Fort Worth thanks to Shannon Young Ray, Breck Ray, Kelsey Holding and Kathy Lombardi. Kelsey is the one who got this ball rolling by asking me if I would come teach in Fort Worth. Before I said yes I checked with Shannon to see if she was available and willing to host me. When that was a “Yes,” we were off to the races.

Kelsey did all the hard work filling the class and finding a host for class. Thanks to the generous Kathy Lombardi for having everything at her beautiful home. The students were a rollicking fun group exactly as I would expect from Texas. They were attentive, curious and had constant improvement. Exactly what I strive for.

Kelsey and Kathy provided yummy lunches and snacks, which was very generous of them. I am looking forward to returning to Fort Worth to spread all the advanced Mah Jongg love.

Shannon and Breck were fantastic hosts. We had a fabulous dinner last night at Quince by the river. Today Shannon took me to her favorite breakfast cafe which was old school Texas. Then tonight she drove me up to see the stockyards and to have dinner at Joe T. Garcia’s. We sat outside and chose from the two dinner items, enchiladas or fajitas. We chose enchiladas and then a ridiculous amount of food came out. It was easily enough for four.

Shannon chauffeured me around the last three days with the final leg being the trip to the airport. Now that’s a good friend who picks you up and takes you back to the airport.
Full of Mexican food I am writing at the gate of my 8:36 flight and should get home by 1:00AM.
A great trip as far as I am concerned.
Shannon’s Treasure Trove
Posted: June 6, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentIt’s been one very busy day. Shannon took me to breakfast in Fort Worth at one of her favorite ‘ole times places. Shannon has always been a tried and true Texan. In boarding school she wore this belt with “Shannon” embossed across the back. In 1978 this belt was not something found in New England, but Shannon would tell us in her strongest Texas Drawl that, “99.9% of the people in Texas wore shannon Belt.” She pulled it out today and it looked exactly as it had all those many years ago. She even wore it in her senior photo.

That was not all she pulled out today while I was teaching Mah Jongg. After dinner we went through her boxes of photos, scrapbooks and memorabilia from our Walker’s Days.

She had the school handbook, which I got quite a kick out of reading all the rules I broke. Like no cars on campus. The paragraph about advisors “serving as her special adult friend,” is a questionable wording. I was quite shocked to read that we had a Yacht Club I never knew about and wish I had taken advantage of.

One of the best things Shannon saved was a small mimeographed plea for money for the Northfield League, to buy new Hymnals. “Contributions could be made to Dana Carter, Emily Davis or Shannon Young.” I was the head of the Northfield League, but I never remember buying any new Hymnals and I wonder what special kind of scam this was.

It has been so much fun rehashing those days. I am so glad Shannon is of pack rat because she had two student handbooks from my senior year and she gave me one. I am going to have to go through more carefully and see exactly how many rules I broke that I never got caught for.
I’m in Fort Worth Now
Posted: June 5, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentAfter being friends with Shannon Young Ray for 45 years I finally come to visit her in Fort Worth. I flew in today to get some time with Shannon before my Mah Jongg class tomorrow.
In true Shannon hospitality she picked me up at the airport and gave me the big tour of Fort Worth. I saw many districts, from the cultural, to the hospital, Westover Hills to TCU. Shannon showed me so many beautiful neighborhoods, each with two or three relatives living on every street.

We eventually wound our way to her beautiful house where I finally got to meet her darling husband Breck. We had a lovely afternoon sharing Shannon stories before Shannon and I went to dinner, leaving Breck to go to a different commitment.
As Shannon and I were being seated for dinner she turned and saw one of her cousins and her family at the table behind us. Yes, she is related to everyone here. Her cousin is a big Mah jongg player so it was fun to talk with her.

I understand why Shannon had to come home to Fort Worth after going to school back East. This truly is her town. She is a great tour guide and I already know I am going to have to find another Mah Jongg gig to bring me back because there are many museums I need to visit and more time with Shannon is going to be necessary.
Beyond Beginners Mah Jongg
Posted: June 4, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 4 Comments
If you are new to Mah Jongg or you have been playing for a while your game can benefit from learning how to maximize your hand by improving your Charleston. I teach a class that goes by two names, “Advanced beginners” is the three day version and “Strategy” is the two day. In both you learn tricks to play better. How to “think” about your hand and make good decisions based on this year’s card.
As the card changes so do the best and worst neighborhoods and hands. You could have great success with one neighborhood last year and a terrible time with it this year. I can help you identify what’s good now and learn how to win more often.
There are open spots for non-club members at the Coral Bay Club June 13-15 in the afternoon class. If you have a place to stay on or near Atlantic beach and want to improve your Mah Jongg let me know and I can help you sign up for class. Beginners Mah Jongg class is sold out that week.
I’m off to Texas in the morning to share the Mah Jongg Magic there so if I am slow to respond it is because I am tied up with Texans.
Big Doings
Posted: June 3, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentMy friends Jane and Warren Brothers invited us to come with them to a screening of a documentary made by the Director and crew who made the tv show “A Chef’s Life.” Warren brought Miss Lillie and her daughter Emma too since Miss Lillie and Warren were principles in the TV show and these were all their friends.

The documentary made by Cynthia Hill is called “Burden of Proof” and airs on HBO this Tuesday. We got to watch the first of the four episode at the Carolina Theatre this afternoon and now I am going to have all the other episodes to find out the answer of the question of what happened to this girl.

After the screening we all went to the surf club and I got to meet so many of the talented documentary film makers who worked on this show as well as “A Chef’s Life.” One of the most interesting Malinda Lowery, who was a producer, and a member of the Lumbee Tribe, as well as a Professor and all around most accomplished woman I think I have ever met.

After the reception Russ and I took Jane, Warren, Miss Lillie and Emma to Rue Cler for dinner. Jane had brought her dog Lucky and thankfully the Manager at Rue Cler, Tony took a liking to lucky and took care of her.

Miss Lillie is quite a picky eater and was pleasantly surprised with how much she loved their salade Verte. It was a lovely dinner enjoyed by all. After dinner Warren brought out a giant bag of veggies he brought me from the farm. He called it a deluxe variety and I have to agree. When we unpacked it at home I was overwhelmed with the amount of produce Warren showered on us.

It was such a fun and different day. I was so happy that Russ finally got to meet Jane and Warren who have been such kind and generous hosts to me in La Grange when I go to teach in Kinston.

I would not be doing my social media best if I did not tell you to watch Burden of Proof on HBO this week, or follow Miss Lillie on Tic Tok @ Ma_Lillie, or Warren at his farm on instagram, @NC_goodness. All great characters, but Jane is the best, you just have to know her to love her.
Ted Lasso, How I Love Thee
Posted: June 2, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentTed Lasso came around at exactly the time I needed him. Exhausted from the pandemic and political fighting I welcomed the happy and uplifting show. As Apple TV would eek out each episode I would gobble them up. Waiting out the dreary months between seasons.
I sobbed as the last episode flashed across my TV screen this week. A good Cat Stevens song alone would have gotten to me, but then add it all the sad goodbyes to Ted and I was a puddle.

As I watched it I realized the episode was full of Easter eggs, but my mind could hardly take them all in. So today I started rewatching Season one of Ted. Right off the bat I saw the kid who took the “ussy” ( as opposed to the selfie) with Ted in the airport leavening London in the last episode. He was in the first episode on the plane taking an “ussy” with Ted.
Ted tells Sam to be like a gold fish and have a ten second memory in episode one, repeated by Ted’s son in the finale.
Then in the second episode Nate had the box, which he made with his niece to collect money from the team. “You put the money in the mouth.” It was the same box he used to collect fines from the team in the last episode.
I am so enjoying reliving all things Ted as I can not part with him. I can see that this will be a forever show for me. One I can rewatch over and over and never tire of, that way I don’t have to face the fact that Ted may not come back. Thank you Ted Lasso. You have been a bright spot which I am going to keep on as long as I can.
The Covenant of Water
Posted: June 1, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 3 Comments
I had a lot of commuting time in the last three days. I spent more than three hours in the car each day and it was a pure pleasure thanks to the most fabulous book I am listening to, The Covenant of Water by Abraham Verghese. I am only 15 hours into the 31 hour performance, but since Verghese is the reader it feels like no time at all.
A decade ago I loved reading his novel Cutting for Stone, so I had high hopes for this one. So far I have not been disappointed. I don’t usually recommend a book I haven’t finished, but this one is a true exception.
Thirty-one hours is a long book, but I feel like I really get my money’s worth for one audible credit. So much better than an eight hour book for the same money. I knew that with all the travel I have this month it was a good time to take on a long listen. I was right. This afternoon when I got home from Rocky Mount I sat in the driveway finishing a chapter. I knew I could have continued just on my phone, but I was loving it so much I didn’t want to turn it off even to just get out of the car. I am so in owe of Abraham Verghese’s talents, in writing and preforming.
#Don’t Tell Dana
Posted: May 31, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentNothing makes me happier than having successful students. I had a class first thing this morning in Rocky Mount. It was day two of beginners and they are catching on. I had an evening class in Raliegh as the third class with a group of young Moms and they definitely have caught the bug.

As I had five hours between those two classes I arranged to meet friends who I met first as students to have lunch and play. One of my favorites, Holly Childs has come to a number of classes and along with her cohort of Dell, Julie and Sarah they laugh all the way through class. Today Holly, Sarah and Martha, who just learned, played with me. Holly won three of the five games we played. It was a great triumph. I could not have been prouder.
We finished up and I made a pit stop in the ladies lounge and was invited to sit down with Dida, Helen and Dorothea and play a hand with them and Dida won in record time.

While I was in class tonight Spencer alerted me to the instagram of one of my students, cute Etta, and she had made custom Mah Jongg drinking cups and one of them said, “Don’t Tell Dana” in reference to when people play non-standard rules. She also used the hashtag, #DTD. I got quite a scream out of that. So fun to spread Mah Jongg Joy across the land.
Ode to the Independent Grocery Store
Posted: May 30, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentI taught this morning in Rocky Mount, NC. Since it was a one class day I finished at noon. I looked at my map (still call GPS a map). To see what was around the club where I was teaching. As I squeezed my fingers closer together giving me an ever wider view of the surrounding area I noticed the name of Dortches.
One time when I was staying at the beach with Reba Huckabee she said that her husband Jim was making a detour to the Red and White in Dortches on his way to the beach. I had never heard of Dortches, but I have had some good local shopping experiences at various Red and White stores through the years.
Jim arrived with store made sausage and barbecue, store made jams and cheeses. When I say store made you should think homemade, by your grandmother. I tucked that bit of information about the Dortches Red and White in the back of my memory and when the name popped up on my map I decided a trip there was in order on my way home.
Thanks to my “Map” I had no trouble finding the store, whose actual name is Smith Red and White, which I think makes up all of Dortches. I went inside and it looked like most grocery stores, until you looked at the giant display of cheese straws by the front door labeled Smith Cheese Straws.
I rambled by the vegetable displays, putting a bag of $3.99 sweet potatoes in my cart. I had mentioned to Russ that I might make a sausage , sweet potato and kale casserole and since this place was known for its sausage I got the requisite sweet potatoes. The display of pork offerings was overwhelming. Since I did not bring a cooler and we are not home that much I held off.

What I did enjoy was the huge display of Smith branded pickled and preserved jars. There must have been 300 different things from cling peaches in jars, homemade sauces and dressings, fig and damson preserves to the pickled jalapeños and okra I purchased for Russ. Giant quart jars for under $8.
I sashayed passed the sweet potato pies and Carmel cakes for $14, looking a lot like the $65 version of Caroline cakes. I skipped the cole slaw, looking like it had too much dressing, on the way to the barbecue, an easy choice for dinner with some homemade sauce, homemade at the store and not at my home.
I did pick up one non-store item, some red pepper flakes we ran out of last night. The small side trip on my way home seemed like it was a good idea. The cost was minimal and the variety was huge. It was a store my father would have loved. Local produce canned and put up just the way his mother did it.
As I was wielding my way back towards the front of the store to pay I lingered at the canning supplies aisle. I have my own produce I grow and could put up, but after seeing the prices at Dortches I decided it’s not worth my time. I am better off teaching Mah Jongg and buying their “homemade.”
Grow Basil – It’s a Command
Posted: May 29, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 Comment
If you grow nothing else this summer you should at least grow basil. It is the easiest herb to grow. You can buy a small pot for a few dollars and out it in almost any soil. It is not fussy. Can withstand almost my amount of neglect, yet still give up the best taste of summer.
So many summer foods are improved by a mere sprinkle of a few torn fresh basil leaves. Your BLT never tasted so good with a bit of basil. Tomato soup is inspired with just a bit of basil. Macaroni salad has a chefiness about it with the addition of some chiffonade of basil running through it.
Herbs are easy to grow and are a good way to get into gardening without much trouble. Deer and bunnies don’t eat basil. Please god, don’t tell them how good it is. You can go on vacation and don’t have to worry that you aren’t harvesting.
It is good to cut it regularly, but you can always make pesto and freeze that. A bouquet of basil brought to a hostess is a welcome gift. It will stay fresh on the counter in a glass of water for a week.
The plants work well in a flower garden. Make sure to cut the tops down to below the next leaf pairs. When they start to get white flower tops cut them back so the plant does not grow to seed. basil will last among time in the green if you keep cutting it.
From eggs to shrimp, basil is your friend. No one will know you are serving a store bought meal if you add your own fresh basil right before putting it on the table.
Trust me, you will appear to have turned into a great cook overnight just hobby growing and using your own fresh basil.
Need Binge Suggestions
Posted: May 28, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentIt has been a terrifically rainy Memorial Day Weekend so far. I am not complaining because we definitely need the rain and it has given me a great excuse to needlepoint.

I am about half way through stitching the first seat of my four game table chairs. Since I am doing it freehand I did not bother to paint the canvas. Working on the background is so boring. The seat is 26”x23”. That’s just big.
I have been binge watching shows that I can follow well without having to look at the screen a lot. That means no foreign shows with subtitles. At this point I am running out of ideas of things to watch. I just finished LOVE AND DEATH, but I had to pay close attention to the last few episodes since my cousin Meredith was in it.
Sadly I have finished The Marvelous Mrs. Mazel and am going to miss Midge forever. I think it was one of the best written shows. I am all caught up on Ted Lasso and tonight will finish Succession.
So what should I watch? Please share any titles you love. British anything is good with me, but not typical Bravo fare. I am hoping that I can knock this seat out by the forth of July. That’s a lot of series. Waiting for your recommendations.
Stop Me From Buying Any More Ribbons
Posted: May 27, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentWhen I was younger I fell in love with ribbons. There was a store in New Canaan that just sold ribbons. I can’t remember the name of the store. It was on South Avenue near the Pratt and Lambert Paint store right before Elm St. I would save my pennies and go in that ribbon store and buy single yard pieces for hair bows and to use to make ribbon belts.
The Preppy Handbook came out when I was in high school so hair bows were acceptable, even into college. When I cut my hair and no longer had a pony tail or a ribboned head band I did not give up my love of ribbons. I just had to find other ways to incorporate the glorious grosgrain or luxurious satin into my life.
Eventually I transferred all this love to ribbons for gift packages. A beautiful bow elevates a humble jar of jam to an occasion. If I get a good ribbon on a present I save it and often reuse it for someone else’s gift.

Today I cleaned out my wrapping closet and discovered that I had eight extra large plastic containers of ribbons and bows. Some are single strands and others are whole rolls of ribbon. I guess that I am going to need to start giving a lot more gifts with a lot more ribbons on them to use up my entire stash of ribbons. These 8 bins are not the entirety of all the ribbons in the house, but I did not dare look to consolidate all the sewing room ribbons, needlepoint ribbons, Christmas ribbons and scrapbook ribbons into one closet. For that I would need a good sized RV.
I am imploring my friends and family to stop me if you ever see me thinking of purchasing any more ribbon. I have an account at May Arts, a ribbon dealer, which I am canceling. I promise to not linger near the Christmas bow on section at Home Good ever again. I am fairly certain that ribbon shop in New Canaan is gone, but I promise not to ever drive down South Ave looking for it. I accept this is a problem in my life and will try and do better.
Layers of Spiciness
Posted: May 26, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a comment
I have a bunch of spinach and a bed of arugula that we have not eaten quickly enough and they are bolting. The arugula gets spicier the larger it grows so I decided to make a soup tonight utilizing both greens and some cilantro from the garden I need to use up before it turns to seed.

My friend Kim Fox brought me some spices that were too hot for her so I used the Arab masala in this soup. It made a spicy soup which was cooked with a dollop or Greek yoghurt. Served with a hunk of Union special sour dough and it was a yummy and healthy supper.
Spinach Arugula Soup

2 sweet onions chopped
4 cloves of garlic
2 T. Olive oil
1 T. Masala spice. You decide spice level.
1/4 t. Nutmeg
Salt and pepper
1 large potato – peeled and diced
6 cups of chicken stock
Five big handfuls of spinach leaves washed
Five big handfuls of arugula leaves washed
1 big handful cilantro leaves and stems washed
Greek yoghurt for garnish
In a big pot put the olive oil, onions and garlic and cook on medium heat for five minutes stirring often. When onions start to get to be translucent add the spices, cook another minute. Add the potato and the stock and bring to a boil. Reduce to simmer and cook for ten minutes.
Add the spinach, arugula and cilantro and cook for five more minutes.
Using a Stick blender blend the whole thing until smooth.
Serve with a dollop of Greek yoghurt.
The Apple Doesn’t Fall Far From the Tree
Posted: May 25, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentJean Harris, the ex Madeira Headmistress and murder of Herman Tanower, the Scarsdale diet Dr. (Imagine those two things are always mentioned when your name comes up) was a wonderful writer. She penned one of my favorite sentences; “One day I put my arm in my coat and out came my mother’s hand.”
Sometimes horrifying for a daughter to realize that she can not escape some traits of her mother’s, the good or the bad. I got my penuriousness directly from my mother and am thankful for it.

Yesterday Carter sent me photos of her little fire escape garden in her fifth-floor Beacon Hill walk-up. If I had to carry groceries up five flights of stairs I would certainly try and grow as many vegetables as I could.

As I was watering my garden today I thought my hand has come out of Carter’s coat when it comes to our love of gardening. She also recently started stitching a needlepoint pillow canvas and playing Mah Jongg. Maybe both of my hands are appearing. At least those are fun things to come from me.
It’s Too Soon
Posted: May 24, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentThank god I was teaching Mah Jongg tonight. I am not ready to have the news cycle dominated by presidential candidates and I’m not good at ignoring the news. I know it might be better for my mental health to not pay attention, but not paying attention gets us crap leaders.
Thirty years ago I said, “Anyone smart enough to be president is smart enough to know they don’t want to be president.” I am not ready for the caravan of clown cars full of want-to-be’s giving speeches.
I wish we could limit the amount of time that parties had to pick a candidate to a month and then one more month to have them face off in an election. Two months of this shit is about all the people should have to endure. The only good news is I don’t live in Iowa or New Hampshire. I also think that political ads should be limited to two months also.
While we are at it let’s outlaw yard signs and flags. I don’t care who you are voting for because all it makes me do is wonder why you are voting that way and I would like to think better of you. I also think it needs to be against the law to fly flags that use the f word. Please, doesn’t anyone care about children?
I’m not a Twitter head because of the Twitter head so I can ignore that big mess. What I really miss is the old days of FCC regulations on news that meant the news had to be the truth. Now with cable, social media, bots and AI nothing ever has to be true. Please bring back Walter Cronkite. We never knew his personal view on politics. It was just the facts and they were real.
Laughing Out Loud
Posted: May 23, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentCarter sent me the best card the other day. “Sorry for what I said when I was a Teenager”

One of the best things about being an older parent is I have forgotten most anything horrible that Carter might have said or done when she was a teenager. Nonetheless it is really nice that she has outgrown teenage tendencies to say mean things to your parents, not that she ever really did.
Probably a better card from her is “Sorry for the mean stuff I thought, but never said, when I was a teenager.”
I think that Carter inherited the ability to keep things to herself from her father. It is a great trait that she does not tell people what might hurt them. I certainly think she could have said worse things to me, but she didn’t.
It took me many decades to learn to hold back. I wish that I had learned that in my teens.
To Carter I say, “no need to apologize, I think you are the greatest and I have forgiven any little slight that was caused by the normal hormonal changes we all have to endure.”
I still got a great laugh out of the card.
A Little of Everything Today
Posted: May 22, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a comment
The birthdays just keep coming this week. From Shay’s and my friend Jan’s yesterday to celebrating Christy’s today and tomorrow my friend Warren. It appears that so many people and creatures I adore were born in the same week.

My stitching group celebrated Christy with a lovely flourless almond orange cake made by Karen. Considering that I stitched all morning I was happy to go and stitch some more, but with cake in the afternoon.
Then I had to pay the piper and go to work tonight. I had a new group of sweet ladies in Raleigh and one young man. Joey came in his stroller with his Mom to class. He was the most well behaved student in the class and picked right up on how to read the card. I think I can now advertise that I can teach anyone from 8 months to 88 years old how to play. I hope Joey grows up loving the sound of tiles clacking together.

I came home from class to watch the latest episode of “Love and Death” on HBO. Carter watched it this afternoon and sent me a photo of my cousin Meredith who was a member of the jury on the show. So fun. A wide ranging day.

Happy Birthday to Shay Shay
Posted: May 21, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentYesterday was Shay’s 12th birthday. She refused to celebrate until Russ came home today.

“How can I have a happy anything when my best human is not here?” Her words coming from her eyes.
At last she got her birthday wish and Russ came home today.
So happy Birthday to the baby Shay. You will always be our baby even if you are a senior dog.
Permission to Be Less Productive
Posted: May 20, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentRuss is in PA visiting his father. That has given me a rare few days alone at home. Before the pandemic these days were regular when Russ traveled so much for work, but zoom still has a hold on consulting so he is home more than I am.
I always have plans of things I should clean, but these couple of days have gotten away from me. Today I spent all morning packing rice and beans at Iglesia Presbiteriana Emanuel. There was a good group of older and younger folks from church doing the work. I was paired up with Rayner’s granddaughter Issi while Raynor and her grandson Parker maned the station at the other end of the table.

Issi and I were a superior team. We packed 500 pounds of beans into two pound bags before we exhausted the available beans and had to switch to rice. Beans are easier to pack because they don’t stick to the outside of the bag the way rice can.
Iglesia has a drive through weekly food pantry which serves 650 cars in two hours on Wednesdays. They give a lot of food to those who need it and beans and rice are an important staple. It was good hands on work to help our neighbors. Because I felt like I had accomplished something I gave myself permission to needlepoint all afternoon.
Consequently none of the chores around the house got done. I probably can mash them all into the time I have tomorrow afternoon, but I am not going to bet on it. I have months of needlepoint to do!
Unwanted Long-Windedness
Posted: May 19, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentI inherited my father’s gift of being able to make small talk with anyone. Curiosity about other people is a strong gene. I am happy to learn where people are from, what they do, how long they have been doing it and what they would rather be doing.
Today I met my match in the most inconvenient of places. As it was a free day for me I scheduled my mammogram. The tech was right on schedule, which was a bonus. I put on the requisite half hospital top opening in the front and was ushered into the squishing room.
The tech was a friendly woman. I learned about her one hour commute, her daughter’s educational history, current job, seven year boyfriend since high school, her scientist husband all while standing half naked.
This scenario is one where I would normally not interview the person I was in the room with, hoping to shorten my naked time. The tech, who also volunteered her ADHD diagnosis, talked my ear off as I was holding my breath with my breast pinched between two giant lucite panels.
For once I was wishing for an introvert as the pressed flesh throbbed as she told me her story. It did feel like I was clamped in longer than I needed to be just so she could finish her tale and release me.
I am certain techs feel like small talk takes away the awkwardness. Honestly I could care less about the nakedness, but the clamping pain being shorter is all I want. Just for fun I also scheduled my colonoscopy today.
Four-Wheeled Convert
Posted: May 18, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentI have been a traveler for as long as time. Every job I ever had required traveling. So luggage has been important to me. I believe in traveling light. Carry-on only is a must.
In spite of the amount I travel I also keep suitcases until the wheels fall off, literally. Until now.
Russ decided that I needed a four wheel carry on to replace my two wheel version. My trusted old suitcase was not worn out. It has been around the world and been stuffed to the gills doing it, but always at a tilt.
On my last flight with Russ he noticed I had to bear the weight of the bag as I rolled through the airport while he just steered his four wheel version. Thus the idea for a new suit case for me was born. He researched options and surprised me with this beautiful bag.

This week my new suitcase made its maiden voyage to the beach. Although I did not have to roll it down the aisle of a plane I did give it a go in the car. I admit that four wheels are so much easier than two. I am not sure why I never saw the need for four wheels before, but I am never going back. Thanks to Russ for recognizing my unnecessary struggle and making my like simpler and more beautiful.
Feeling Like the Most Important Person
Posted: May 17, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 2 CommentsToday would be my father’s 85th birthday if he were still with us. The fact that he made it to 83 is quite a feat. I am so sorry that he is not still around to hear about my adventures all over North Carolina teaching it Mah Jongg.
He would have loved that I spent his birthday in Morehead City, a place of great shenanigans for him in his VES and UNC days. He always told me never to take a drink called Purple Jesus if it was offered to me based on his dirty rush experience.
He would want to know all the names of all my students and he would tell me that he had gone to school with their father or was the Marshall for their aunt. He would know who everyone was when I never know who anyone is.
To me all my students are just nice people I get to teach. Whenever someone says, “Well, you know who she is don’t you?” I always respond, “No, and I really don’t care.” I either like you for you or I don’t like you for you. Who your people are is of little consequence.
My father was that way too. Even though he did know who everyone was, he really didn’t care. He just liked nice people. He would have loved these sweet friends Scottie had over for cocktails tonight after class.

I hope my Dad is smiling down knowing that we still tell “Ed stories.” His body may be gone, but he will always loom large in the memories of those who knew him or even those who just encountered him, like a waitress or a taxi driver he would take great interest in. He had a way of making each person he met feel special, like they were the most important person in the room.
I wish that I had that same effect on people, no matter who they are. I wish that everyone always felt like they were the most important person in the room.
Congratulations to Carter
Posted: May 16, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 2 Comments
Tomorrow is Carter’s last day at her first job out of college. She was not challenged there much so she decided it was time to move on. It was no surprise it was not hard enough after the semester in college she went to school full time, worked full time at Bain Capital, was a TA in two different classes and worked her on campus job as a coordinator in the explore program. That was nuts. But Carter also thrives when she has lots to think about.
I am so proud that she got her next job. She found the listing on LinkedIn, five weeks after it was posted and after 115 other people had already applied. She had weeks and weeks of interviews and was told she got the job beating out people who had all the right experience, which she did not, because of her business acumen and her core values that aligned with the companies mission.
She will be the full time hr person for an up and coming company in the field of synthetic biology. Yeah for Carter. I know that your last day of your first job will go smoothly and I am thrilled you are taking a little time before jumping into your new and exciting job at a place that is so exciting with people who are so interesting.
I can’t wait to see how this adventure stretches you. You made this happen all on your own. This is one proud parent moment. Sorry for the gushing (I actually held back quite a lot.).
Joys of Mah Jongg Friends
Posted: May 15, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentThe best thing that comes from teaching Mah Jongg is making new friends. As far as I am concerned you just can’t have too many friends. Playing a game with someone is a tried and true way to make friends. We learned to do it as children and the same rules exist into adult hood.
You like people you are fun to play with. You like those who are kind and helpful. You like people who are fair and honest.
Teaching people something that is fun is the best way to make friends. I count myself as nothing but lucky as this is what I get to do with my time. One of the side benefits to me is how kind and generous these friends are to me.

Today I drove down to Morehead city to spend three nights with my friend Scottie. We first met because her husband Barry and I were on the food bank board together. He is a favorite of mine and I loved Scottie the first time I met her, but really got to know her through Mah Jongg. She generously invited me to come stay at their house as I am teaching at the Dunes club this week.

I also got to spend a little time with my friend Mary Jo today, who took me to her favorite store where I got a cute dress. I never would have gotten to know these sweet women as well as I did, if at all if it weren’t for Mah Jongg.
I am not discounting my old friends, who I love and lean on regularly. Today I had lunch with dear Shelayne before I made my drive. I have not gotten to see her as much as I would like, but with her 10th grandchild on the way she is more than busy. I will probably never have anything close to 10 grandchildren so I am just going to have to keep collecting Mah Jongg friends. The good thing is I never have to wipe their noses.
Mother of All Days
Posted: May 14, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentIn my childhood we were not good at celebrating Mother’s Day. I can remember going to church and other mother’s had orchid corsages on. My friends’ families would be going out to lunch after church to celebrate mother’s day. My mom was lucky if we drew her a picture.
I blame my lack of Mother’s day celebrating on my Dad. He wasn’t big on birthdays either. Christmas was the big gift giving day. He kind of gave you gifts when he thought of it or you needed it. He gave my mother every Saturday off by taking us three girls out of the house early in the morning and doing all the errands with us. She also got coffee in bed every morning so that everyday was like Mother’s Day for her.

Thankfully Russ and Carter are much better at acknowledging Mother’s Day. Carter sent me beautiful flowers with the best note and Russ gave me a trip to visit Carter.

I on the other hand called my mother, continuing the no gift Mother’s Day of my childhood. I should do better. Happy Mother’s Day to all the mother’s out there. Everyone deserves to be treated well everyday, but it is nice to have one day when the guilt gets you at least breakfast in bed. (For the record Russ brings me breakfast everyday so I am well spoiled.)
I hope my mother knows how much she is loved, even though she never got an orchid corsage or a lunch out.
I Can Make It Rain
Posted: May 13, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized Leave a commentAll week I have been praying for rain. I was too busy to properly water my gardens. I had to ask Russ to do it at 6:30 one morning when he was too busy to water. I like when Mother Nature waters for me.

Today rain is predicted, but later at night. I wasn’t sure I could wait to see if that actually happens. See, if it doesn’t then my poor plants are that much more stressed.

I waiting until the late afternoon to see if the rain came. It didn’t so I went out to work in the garden. I have a few new zucchini plants to put in as the last of the squash plantings. I had six more bush bean seeds to put in as part of the successive rows of beans. Weeding and pruning and the harvesting to spinach for dinner. I got a good amount of those jobs done except for all the weeding of the pathways. Then the rain started.

At first a few sprinkles. I kept working. Then a little stronger, not drenching, but more than sprinkles. I thought, “Well, now I won’t have to water.” I decided I should come inside and not ruin my freshly washed hair.

Shay was with me and we sashayed into the garage. I changed out of my garden clogs, took off my gloves, stowed the pruning and harvesting shears. Once inside I looked out the window on the other side of the house. The rain was heavier on that side. I swear my house is the dividing line between plenty of rain and barley any.

As soon as I was settled inside working on a new project I glanced out at the garden. No rain. Yes, the cars were wet, but I could not see any new drops coming down.

I can get it to rain if I go out and work in the garden, but I can also make rain stop by coming inside. I’m now going back to the garage and put on my gloves and my gardening clogs and am going out and turn on the hose. That will mean we will get plenty of rain in the middle of the night.

I Forgot I Write a Blog
Posted: May 12, 2023 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 CommentI was just about to go to bed and I realized I had not written my blog today. How could this happen? Todays blog will be the last one of my 12th year as tomorrow is my blog anniversary starting my 13th year of writing it everyday.
You would think a twelve year daily habit would actually be a habit, but even so I almost forgot. Perhaps the toll of a busy work week, or my punishing needlepoint push to make progress on this giant seat cushion is what caused me to up and forget to write.
When nothing too exciting happens it makes it hard to find a subject to write about. Not that nothing exciting has been happening, but I am just not allowed to report on some thing until I have been given the all clear.
Please excuse this lame post as I am down right exhausted, have no new recipes to report and no great photos. I will leave you with this photo from early morning at my “Raleigh class site”. I did have a great group of women this week and this was the calm before they all showed up to class to soak up the Mah Jongg Knowledge.

Happy Friday.