Donald Trump’s Potential Defense

The following blog is satire. For those of you who love Donald Trump please don’t read it, or if you do please don’t send me any comments about it because they might reveal that you 1. Don’t know what satire is, or 2. Might not have any sense of humor at all. If you don’t like that I might comment on political figures stop reading now. I don’t write this blog for you, I write it for myself.

Donald Trump’s Potential Defense
Donald Trump went on a twitter rage starting at 3:20 this morning and kept at it for two early morning hours. Questions have arisen about what he was doing up at 3:20. Since I have a husband who is often up at those crazy hours I don’t find that so strange. But the fact that Trump himself keeps tweeting about this Miss Universe story is crazy, since he is the one keeping it alive.
His team needs to come up with some answer for these rants in the middle of the night and I think that they should blame Ambien. The insomnia drug has been blamed for people doing all kind of crazy things in their sleep, like eat entire sheet cakes or drive the wrong way down the highway.  
If Trump could come out and say that something other than his own brain is to blame for the telling the American people to check out a sex tape he might win back some of the voters he lost in the debate.  
Perhaps he also could blame his own weight gain on Ambien. I notice that not one news outlet has mentioned that it is a little like the kettle calling the pot black for him to call women fat pigs. I am certainly not one to ever say someone is over weight since most of my life I have been one of those women Trump would say mean things about, but come on Trump, have you looked in the mirror lately? Perhaps you are too distracted by the orange color to notice your stomach.
Maybe Trump’s wife could put some parental controls on his Twitter account. But then what fun would we have when we woke up in the morning without the crazy rantings of a self absorbed guy? I guess we are lucky that he doesn’t drive himself round because he certainly has the potential to drive the wrong direction on the highway.

3 Comments on “Donald Trump’s Potential Defense”

  1. Mary Few says:

    hahahahahaha! Love it!

  2. Sheppy Vann says:

    And now he and his surrogates plan to attack Hillary b/c she was unkind to Bill’s paramours-and who does he choose to lead the charge? Rudy Guiliani and Newt Gingritch. The 3 of them have an aggregate if 9 wives and all three are established adulterers….hmmm
    And by the way, Donald, most wives would not support and embrace their husband’s paramours. His strategy for winning the college educated women with these issues is almost as bright as trying to win African American voters by proposing stop and frisk nationwide. Poor Kellyanne-she tries valiantly to make a silk purse only to have the sow’s ear emerge attached to a male chauvinist pig.

  3. Sheppy vann says:

    Poor Kellyanne-she tries valiantly to make a silk purse and the sow’s ear appears and it’s not a sow’s ear after all, but part of a male chauvinist pig.

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