Happy Cheetos DayPosted: September 17, 2013 Filed under: Diet- comedy | Tags: Bull Street Market, Cheetos, Peanut Butter Egg, Reese's, Toro Pizza, Watt's Grocery 1 Comment
Before you get all in a wad that you missed National Cheetos day, relax, this is not a national holiday. If it were it would have to be before Yom Kipper so that you could quickly atone for the sin of enjoying those cheesy orange puffs. No, Cheetos Day is my friend Mary’s own personal annual event. See Mary loves Cheetos but she only allows herself one bag once a year. That is a fairly good diet routine because an addictive food like Cheetos with no nutritional well being at all needs to be moderated.
I used to have a Weight Watcher leader, Eve, who waited all year for Easter to come around so that she could indulge her one big splurge of a Reese’s Peanut Butter Egg. It is like a Reese’s peanut butter cup, but the filling is slightly fluffier and the ratio of peanut butter to chocolate is different making it Eve’s favorite food she must avoid except for once a year. The Reese’s Egg was Eve’s kryptonite and it was never a good thing for us Weight Watcher members to have her talk about what it was going to be like when she ate it. She justified it by telling us it was just four points (in the old points system) and that she saved up her points to eat it, but it always made me crave one of those PB&C (that’s peanut butter and chocolate) eggs.
If I were to relegate all the foods I crave, but need to stay away from, to their own one day a year I easily could have a special day everyday. The calendar would look something like this, Bull Street Market Gooey Butter Cake on October 1, Toro Pizza’s Lemon Pizza on October 2, Watt’s Grocery Pimento Cheese on October 3, ETC, ETC, ETC. I easily could fill 365 days with a different food that should be forbidden to me and my tend-to-blow-up-just-looking-at-carbs-body. Even though I am just eating that bad for me food once a year when you add it to the other naughty foods I would be in a bad place.
No Cheetos, or Reese’s, or cake, pizza, pimento cheese days for me. I need to celebrate National Radish Day or Celerypalooza. After a few hundred more of those days I might finally fit in my skinniest pants that have patiently awaiting their chance to be comfortably zipped up on me. The only day I really am hoping to observe is You Reached Your Goal Day!
I had my girls believing for the longest time that you could only have cheetos on your birthday. That was like a cultural norm or something. They figured out when they were older that all the people they saw at the grocery store with cheetos in their baskets weren’t all celebrating birthdays. Good while it lasted.