Rule Breaking Friends

Once my house is decorated for Christmas I like to take advantage of all the sparkle, twinkle and shine and have people over for frivolity, fun and food as much as possible.  I wrote earlier in the season that I really don’t want or expect hostess gifts and even though most everyone who is invited to my house reads this blog, at least once in a while, they all ignored me.

I guess the southern social mores are just too strongly ingrained in the group I hang with, but many even apologized as they came through the door and handed me a bag knowing they were disobeying my wishes.  Some even tried to sneak a gift in without my seeing it, leaving it under a table or tucked behind the Christmas tree.  I guess I will have to forgive them because I actually like these people and most of them actually brought a very thoughtful gift.

As the party ended last night and the last guest was heading down our front walkway all the lights in the house went out.  I was standing at the open front door calling out goodbye as I was suddenly thrust into darkness and I thought, “Wow, they brought a present and took my electricity home with them.”  Really, I thought that between giving walking desk demonstrations and running over 500,000 Christmas lights during a party I had blown our whole electrical system.  But I looked around and noticed that every other house in the neighborhood was black.

I heard a loud voice coming from the garage as a caterer was calling for help since she was standing in a strange garage full of sharp objects and a hot stove with no flash light.  Russ came to the rescue gathering all the lanterns, flash lights, candles and I phones he could find so that we could continue cleaning up and let the help go home.

At last all the plates were loaded in the dishwasher waiting the return of current to run it and all the empty bottles had been taken to recycling.  I decided that I would not try and tackle the gaggle of gifts in the dark and took to my bed with Carter who did not want to go to her end of the house alone in the dark.  Russ was relegated to the guest room where he watched videos on his Ipad that still had a charge.

The power returned in the night and so by the time I got out of bed Russ had already washed the remaining platters, run the dishwasher and tidied up.  Sometime after two in the afternoon I noticed that tissue paper had been pulled from one of the unopened hostess gifts.  I look around the bag and nothing seemed too disturbed, but I thought it was as good a time as any to open the loot.

I picked up the bag I assumed the tissue had been in and found a holiday coffee mug with a gift enclosure saying, “from Beth and Mike… Peanut Butter Fudge.”  I thought that was an interesting Holiday greeting considering it was a mug.  I continued opening, frames, wine, oil and vinegar, my cup over runneth.

Shay came into the living room to sniff around while I was opening.  I reached down to give her a snuggle and that’s when I caught a whiff of the distinct smell of peanut butter.  I went into the sunroom and found a small perfectly clean Ziploc bag with the corner torn open.  I think that explains the “Peanut Butter Fudge” note.

So now I have a new request to all my guests who may read this.  Not only do I really just want your company and maybe an invitation to your house in the next ten years, rather than a hostess gift, but if you do bring one and it is food, put it up high, unless it is for Shay.  The good news in this story is that peanut butter fudge is one of my favorite things and Beth is a fabulous cook so it is all for the best that Shay Shay ate it and I did not.

The moral of this story is I can’t depend on any of these gift giving friends to be the ones who are in charge of my living will because if they can’t follow my wishes about not bringing gifts they certainly can’t be depended upon to pull the plug on me when the time comes.

Note:  This is the first blog I have written while standing at my walking desk.  I got three thousand steps doing it.