New and Improved?

I hate to be the one that breaks this to you, but all the new stuff you got for Christmas, some of which you have not even used yet, is passé and out of date.  That is according to the horde of catalogs that came in the mail the last two days.  Marketers have learned that in order to sell more stuff they need to entice us with “new & improved,” or even better, “new and exclusive” stuff.

January is officially the month of improvement.  No one makes a New Year resolution to make something just the same or worse, where’s the resolution in that?  Everybody starts January out trying to do something or everything better.  Consequently, January is the best month to come out with the upgraded and refined versions of things.  If you can tie those new things to another way someone can improve them selves then January is the month you hit the jackpot for selling stuff.

For instance, Williams-Sonoma sent me a “Fresh Start 2013” catalog that featured a “New and Exclusive “ Cuisinart electric yogurt maker in it for the bargain price of $129.00.  January is the best time to push these machines because most people think that making their own yogurt is a great idea when they are thinking about losing weight.  That is until they try and make it from fat free milk and discover they hate the taste of the yogurt they make them selves and go back to buying it at the store.  The yogurt maker goes to the appliance dungeon with the juicer, tabletop fryer and chocolate fountain.  (Not all bad appliance decisions were healthy ones.)  If you really want to try and make your own yogurt you only need a saucepan, a thermometer and some other yogurt as a starter.

The King Arthur Flour catalog today had an item that is a best seller at $147.95 which I find amazing; a collapsible bread proofing box which can also be used not only for dough, but wait for it… yogurt too.  I just put my bread dough in a bowl covered with a tea towel and put it in the microwave that is off.  Amazingly that box of a microwave has no trouble remaining a constant temperature and dough rises perfectly.  I just saved myself $147.95.  I guess it being collapsible is a bonus when moving it to the appliance graveyard so it takes up less space.

My favorite tread in the new and improved category is the explosion of salts.  I am not talking bath salts or Morton’s salt, but the “Rare Gourmet Sea Salts” advertised in the Chefs tool catalog.  The most expensive is Murray River, which is described as “delicate flaky texture, which melts quickly and evenly, the perfect finishing salt.”  At over $5.33 cents an ounce I would like it to stick around for a while.  In case you are unfamiliar with how much regular salt costs, an ounce of Morton’s salt is 5 cents.  Murray river is 10,660% more per ounce before shipping and I have to tell you that salt is fairly similar.

Sometimes new and improved just isn’t.  Take High Protein Special K, which has been my breakfast of choice for at least seven years.  Without increasing the amount of protein per serving those pesky people at Kellogg’s changed the taste and it in no way resembles the old cereal and tastes much worse.  Why improve something without actually making it better?

My suggestion is that if you want to improve something in January try your attitude, outlook or temperament, they are all free and never have to be moved to the graveyard.