Compliments Go a Long Way

Today I got my second of two crowns in the New Year. Not my favorite thing to do, but better than the alternative. I have a really nice young Dentist, Andrew who came into his father’s practice a couple of years ago. I lay silently and still in the chair following all the instructions Andrew gave me as he checked and adjusted the tiny new molar. When we were almost done he said to me, “You are a really good patient.”

I thought it was a funny compliment. I just did as I was told and why wouldn’t I? I figure if I do something wrong it would make his job harder and that might cause me pain. Rather than asking what makes a good patient I just took the compliment and reveled in being good at something even if it was as small as being still and compliant.

Accepting compliments is an art I feel is under appreciated. So often when I tell a grown woman she looks good that day the comeback is hardly ever just, “Thank you.” More often than not the laudation is met with some discounting. “Oh no. The bags under my eyes are horrible,” or “I have not even had a shower today.” Those statements are not meaning to fish for more compliments, but they sometimes end up making me intensify the original statement. What I should say is, “Wow, if you look this good dirty imagine how great you would look if you put some effort in it.”

By not responding to my Dentist’s comment I was able to just enjoy being told I was good at something which does not happen as often as we need once we get to adulthood. Perhaps he did not mean to even say it out loud, but I’m glad he did. It made my day a little better and smoothed over any feeling I had about having to get the crown in the first place.

I have no idea if Andrew tells all his patients they are good, but his tone sounded very sincere. It seems like it would be the best client retention program ever if when you left the dentist you felt a little better about yourself and not just that your teeth looked better.

I think this practice could be adopted by all kinds of service providers. When my plumbers come to my house they could tell me that I have the cleanest toilets. When I go for my annual annual (you women know what I am talking about) the Doctor could tell me I’m really good at putting my feet in those stirrups.

It’s just a better practice than telling people they aren’t good at things. Like when I walk through a department store and a lady at the cosmetic counter asks a question like, “What are you using on your face? I have something much better.” Yes, you may have something better, but do you think I want to talk to you now that you have insulted me?

So give someone a sincere compliment tomorrow. I hope they can accept it and enjoy it. Not only will you brighten their day, but they will probably think a little more kindly of you. That’s a win win.