For the Beauty of the Earth

I’m in Rocky Mount, NC teaching three Classes a day for the next three days. Rocky Mount had a tornado last week when Helene blew through. It was a bad one, EF 3-4 and tore up a bunch of commercial buildings. I had a break between my afternoon class and my night class so I left the Club and ran an errand.

When I was done with my errand I came out to my car to a huge black cloud hanging very low. I did not like the look of it. As I was driving back to the club my emergency weather alert went off on my phone and my car. Tornado warning. Not again I thought. I drove back to the parking lot of the club, but the rain was coming down so hard I did not want to get out of my car and run into the building.

I parked in the middle of the parking lot far from any trees or light posts. I kept watching the sky from all the windows of the car. The black was moving and not in a circular motion. I watched the map of the storm on my phone. I was fairly certain the storm was moving away from me.

Eventually it did. I looked out my side window as I was about to get out of my car to run into the club and I saw the most perfect rainbow I have ever seen. It curved from one side of the ground to the other. The colors were so intense and well delineated.

I take this as a sign that all is OK. Thanks for the beauty of the earth. I figure we all need a gorgeous rainbow right now.

Helping Anyone Is Good

This weekend I felt very inadequate about the disaster in Western NC. I know Tennessee, Florida and Georgia were also hurting, but my North Carolina took a big hard hit. I am not a first responder, not a lineman, can’t remove debris, drive a truck full of supplies, or hike a mountain and find people’s loved ones.

What I did instead was stay home and cook for my beloved friend Holley who has ALS. She has been dealing with it for a while now and really needs all the calories she can get. This also means her family needs food too as they have their hands full.

Holley can’t eat solids, but they can purée anything so she can at least taste it as it is going down in liquid form. She told me she has been craving cheese burger casserole like 1970’s Hamburger Helper. So I made up a big batch. I packed it with cheese and 20% fat hamburger, pasta and heavy cream and more cheese. If anything can help put calories in Holley’s tiny little body this can.

I got a chance to spend time with her tonight. She had beautiful eyelashes and just ignore the indentation marks her breathing mask left, she is so gorgeous. Holley might not be able to speak, but she can type and we had a great conversation. Her husband Paul and oldest daughter Penn and a young family friend from Alabama were all there with us. They had red wine vinegar chicken with rice and cole slaw and some cinnamon blondies. I also brought cheddar broccoli soup so Holley could eat that for lunch.

I may not have been able to help the people affected by Helene, but helping Holley and Paul was still helping. And that is what I needed to do. It helped me feel better.

If you feel called to help hurricane victims Red Cross, or Samaritans Purse, the Food Bank or search the state Attorney General’s office website for approved charities. But you can also help people in your own town who need help. The problem with huge natural disasters is then sometimes local charities lose out. The best thing you can do is anything that is helping others.

We are going to be in this for the long haul. I remember after Katrinia our church was doing recovery work in the gulf for months after the storm. Don’t burn out. Just start and help.

I can cook for Holley and do something for Western NC. It’s all good.

Devastated

North Carolina has been badly ravaged by Hurricane Helene. The extent of the damage in the western Mountains will take weeks to access, but the videos I’ve seen already are devastating. It wasn’t just the Mountains, but Rocky Mount in the eastern part of the state had an EF 3-4 tornado that took out a shopping center. This after they had a huge tornado last year take down a warehouse. Thankfully in Durham we just got more rain to add to the already record breaking rain we have had in July, August and now September.

For those climate deniers it’s time to wake up and smell the storm. Man has had an affect on the climate. Project 2025 wants to do away with NOAA, the people who tell us about forming hurricanes and the paths they may take so people can get out of the way.

If you own vacation property on the coast of North Carolina you should be especially interested in voting for candidates who don’t deny what is happening. Trump made the flippant remark that they will just be more beach front property as the sea levels rise.

The man truly does not understand if the water gets higher we have less beach front because the circumference gets smaller. On the outer banks ten houses have fallen into the ocean in Rodanthe. I bet those people who lost their houses believe in climate change, but then again the fact that they had these houses might mean they didn’t believe things were changing.

Thoughts and prayers are not going to fix the roads and bridges washed out in Western North Carolina. People who had their houses wash away are going to need help. Those emergency services come from the federal and State government. If you let the project 2025 people come into office there will not be a federal government agency to help in these times of disaster.

This is a wake up call to believe scientists and do what we can to build back in safer ways, in safer places and do what we can to slow climate change. Oh yeah, some of those people in mobile homes, which easily float down flooding rivers are the same people who did not believe doctors and scientists about vaccines and had relatives die unnecessarily from Covid because they thought the government was out to get them by requiring vaccines.

The government is not out to get you. The government is out to help you If you chose the right government. Those of you who listen to the crazies who want to sell you bomb shelters are doing it just to sell you stuff. Those bomb shelters got flooded in the hurricane and all that survival food you bought is ruined. To survive you need to not elect crazy leaders.

Dan Shannon, Creator of Durham Magazine

One day in 2008 I got an e-mail from a man I didn’t know, named Dan Shannon. He wrote that he was the publisher of Durham Magazine and wanted to talk to me. I had just received the first issue of this new Magazine in my mailbox not three days before. I had read it cover to cover and thought it was a nice idea, but thought it felt like it was missing a real connection to Durham.

Apparently that is why Dan was contacting me. I called him in reply to his email and he asked if I would come over to his office in Chapel Hill, where he had been publishing Chapel Hill Magazine for over five years. Not exactly sure why he wanted to talk to me, but curious, I went to meet him.

The Dan I met that first meeting was a gregarious yankee transplant a few years older than me. He told me about moving to Chapel Hill and starting that Magazine. He realized that Durham was a bigger fish and also needed a city magazine so he put out the first issue using the Chapel Hill Magazine Staff. He asked me what I had thought of the first issue.

Still not sure why I was there, and being myself, as I always I am, “I told him the cover photo of Scott Howell, owner of Nana’s eating a biscuit in front of Biscuitville, was a cute twist, but a terrible photo. I went on to critique some of the articles that had nothing to do with Durham.

When I had finished he told me that my friend Nata Boyzemski, had similar thoughts about the first issue. He was friends with Nata and as she was a Durham native he wanted her opinion. I was glad that as a Durham transplant I had the same reaction as Nata and was not the first to tell this guy the truth.

That was when Dan revealed the reason he wanted to meet me. “Nata told me I should hire you.” I was a little taken aback. Hire me for what I thought? I had retired from my consulting job to stay home with Carter. What did this guy know about me.

“I want to hire you to be the Durham voice of the magazine.” Not exactly sure what that meant, or even if I wanted to work again I said, “Look, I am very busy. I have a nine yer old daughter and I am very involved at her school. My husband has a company in Durham and works internationally and travels all the time and I travel too. I am on two non-profit boards and about to be chair of one of them and they take up a lot of my time…and I am a real bitch.”

“Now, I definitely want to hire you, “ Dan said.

I was not quite sure what the job would be, nor was Dan. We talked a little longer and I told him I would get back to him the next day. When I didn’t call by three in the afternoon he called me. He decided that I so would make a great editor. He had no idea if I had one bit of skill as an editor, which I did not. I told him that. We talked some more and eventually he talked me into being the community events editor, which really was a nebulous title. He gave me a writing assignment for the second issue of the magazine to write about my work at the Food Bank.

I turned it in and I thought someone would heavily edit it. It was printed word for word in the magazine. Dan and I would have a lot of back and forth about how much I would work and exactly what I would do. Sometimes I would go to the office and work with the kids who really worked there, be in pitch meetings suggesting article ideas and making Durham connections which is really what I was hired for and then I would go weeks, not seeing anyone and just turning in assignments. I mostly got to pick my own subjects and interview people who were doing good works in Durham.

Dan would tell me he wanted me to write about something and then when the magazine came out I would discover it was the cover story. This went on for many years. My favorite story was one I had to fight to even get to write, my interview with Colin Firth.

A movie was being filmed in Durham that starred Orlando Bloom, Amber Tamblyn, Ellen Burstyn and Collin Firth. The production company’s communication director had put a press release out saying that there was not going to be any press interviews with the cast during filming, just during the press tour when the movie was released.

I argued that the cast was not going to return to Durham for the press tour and we only had this one shot. Just to shut me up, Dan and the Head editor Matt told me to see what I could dig up. Through a very convoluted way I befriended the communications guy, had him to our house for dinner, and asked for the interview. He told me I could interview Orlando and I told him only Colin would do. It happened and was the biggest selling issue of Durham Magazine thanks to the international Colin Firth Fan Club who kept contacting the magazine to buy issues. Dan complained to me about all the international shipping they were having to do, but was still thrilled with my get as no other media outlet got anything from the movie. For the record the movie, called Main Street, was terrible, as Colin had predicted in our interview, but he still really liked the town of Durham. Just what the magazine wanted.

It was never exactly clear when I stopped working for Dan. My Mah Jongg career was taking all my time. I was listed in the mast head of the magazine for years when I had not done a thing. Every once in a while I would get a call from some young editor who I didn’t know and they would say, “Dan suggested I call you…”.

Two years ago Dan asked me to write a column for one issue. I went in to the office to see him and his wonderful wife Ellen who eventually came to work there with him after leaving her big corporate job. It was clear to me something was not right with Dan. Ellen told me he was dealing with an illness. He was still sweet as he could be.

The staff photographer took a picture or us to go in the issue with my column. I was so glad he did so I have this picture of Dan, Ellen and myself, along with Amanda and Rory who I also worked with at the magazine.

I found out today, that Dan Shannon passed away. I had just seen him this summer and was hopeful that he was beating his illness. He always gave me a big hug and said wonderful things to me when I saw him. I could tell from Ellen that it was not all good.

Dan was a man with big ideas. He loved Ellen and their three kids. He hired lots of young talent and in my case, old. He was a great cheerleader for the communities he published about. He always told us we were not investigative journalists, but promoters of our city.

I loved the work I got to do with him. We had a mutual admiration for each other and I will miss him. Thankfully his vision lives on in his company, and Ellen who is the backbone and Rory who grew up in the business and runs it how with Ellen. Dan was the heart.

I would not be the writer I am now if it weren’t for Dan. He rarely edited my work because he said, “You have a special voice.” I’m sure he could have edited me heavily, lord knows we all need a good editor, but I love him for always letting me be me. Durham is better because of him. I will miss him.

The Economy is Going In the Right Direction

I stopped to get gas in Kinston yesterday. It was $2.71. All this talk from Trump about the cost of gas going up is bunk. It’s going down. He likes to portray everything under him was great and under anyone else was terrible, but it’s just not true, especially economically. When gas goes down, so does the cost of shipping which affects the prices of everything.

The Stock Market keeps going up, finishing higher and higher. Economic experts say the Trump tariffs will haunt the growth in the economy. Why would we take economic advice from someone who filed for bankruptcy six times?

The crime rate has been going consistently down in all major categories, except car thefts, and maybe crimes committed by politicians.

Inflation rate went up due to Covid and now is back down to almost the same rate as Trumps, but wages are up for the majority of workers.

Unemployment rate is about in the exact same place as it was during Trump.

Drug Overdose deaths are going down in huge ways, turning around a wave that had gone nothing but up for years.

For years Trump complained about America’s crumbling Infrastructure, but actually did nothing about it. Now Bridges, roads, airport, rail roads all over the country are being fixed making travel safer for everyone, thanks to the current administration.

Yes, we need more starter homes and we need student debt relief, but interest rates are heading in the right direction making the cost of borrowing cheaper so more people can afford to borrow and buy.

Why would we disrupt all these indicators moving in the right direction? Don’t fall for the false ads and speeches claiming things are not good. Look the data up yourself. Don’t stop this good new train.

Last Night in K-Town

Gotta love my Kinston crowd. Even though I’m teaching in Goldsboro, I’m getting to spend time with Kinston Friends this week. Tonight Debbie organized a dinner at a Mexican restaurant so I could see the friends who were available. (We missed Kristi and Becky)

I just adore, Ann, Debbie, Francis, Molly, Mary Ann and Jane. There is never a dull moment probably because there is never a silent second. It really doesn’t matter where we go to eat in Kinston, these ladies will know everyone in the place. Tonight a young man and his toddler some and very pregnant wife stopped by our table. They were going to the hospital have their new daughter at five in the morning. This is real small town America kind of stuff I love.

I don’t need to come to Kinston to teach as often because I think I have already taught everyone who is old enough to learn. Now I have to teach in near by towns and just come and stay in Kinston. Kristi will be happy to know we did schedule the new card class for April so I know I will be back then.

Until next time K-town girls. Adore you all.

Back with the Brothers

From the title you might think I am hanging with Cool and the gang, but those are not the Brothers I am talking about. I was teaching at Walnut Creek Country club today. I had two big classes of fun people. When I finished up my last class they asked me if I was going home to Durham.

Going back and forth and Hour and forty minutes each way is too much every day so I called up my friend Jane and got myself invited to stay with her and her husband Warren. By this time I am like the relative you wish wouldn’t come for Thanksgiving, but you can’t figure out how to keep her from showing up.

I have a regular room and even if I didn’t call and invite myself, I do know how to get in and I might just sleep here and not tell them I am coming. The only problem is I also like the shower in their master bedroom, so they might notice me when I come in and use the shower.

It was no surprise to me that half of the last Mah Jongg class either knew Jane and Warren or were related to Warren. Gotta love Eastern North Carolina.

Thankfully, Jane and Warren always welcome me warmly and we have a great time. We went in to the Big K-town for dinner. Stopping first at Mother Earth Brewery to talk with Warren’s friends. I got to me Mr. Reynolds who owns my favorite seafood store.

We went to Jay’s for sushi, which now that Chef and the Farmer is closed is about the only show in town. Since Warren is the farmer, we thought for sure we could get a table. Not so fast. They were short a waitress or two, this problem could be solved all over the place if we updated out immigration policy as the bipartisan group tried to do. We desperately need more workers and immigration is the way to get them.

I digress. We had a little trouble getting a table, but after I had a little logical talk with the hostess and Warren was embarrassed that someone from the big city would point out some holes in the logic of why we couldn’t get a table, we got a table. Before that happened, two nice men from Tennessee invited me to sit with them, then it turned out a table of my mah Jongg students from the beach were sitting near by had to say hi, eventually Jane, Warren and I sat down together and got our sushi fairly quickly.

We had a fun dinner, as we always do, even if getting to it was a zig zag event. I eventually hit the wall as I had been up since 5:00 AM. Tomorrow will be another chance to spend time with Jane and Warren and maybe play some Mah Jongg. For now I have to sleep so I am ready for my fifty students tomorrow.

The Lost Art of the Introduction

Long before I was born, which was a millennia ago, when someone wanted to meet a new person they found a common friend who would introduce them. It acted as a reference as well as a way to get all the details about the person correct.

The introduction, in the olden days, could go something like, “Mrs. Lange, I would like to introduce you to my Mother-in-law, Mrs. Frances. She is visiting us from Knoxville, Tennessee where she and her husband live. Like you, she is an avid gardener.”

“Mother Frances, I would like to introduce you to Mrs. Lange. I have known her for over ten years and we sit together at church.”

In that introduction the two strangers, being me and Mrs. Frances, learned each other’s names, where we live, something we are both interested in and how we are connected to the the Introducer. It was very simple, yet, thorough enough that the I could begin a conversation with Mrs. France’s without having to put her through an inquisition.

Nowadays, I often get texts from people who say something like, “I want to take a Mah Jongg course.” Well, they do get right to the point.

I have to pull teeth to get some preliminary information out of them. “Hi, what’s your name? Can you tell me how you found me? Where do you live? Are you looking for Beginner or Beyond Beginner classes?”

It is so amazing how many people assume I know who they are when they text me. If I don’t have your phone number in my contacts with your name, when you text me the only identifier is your phone number. I also do not know where each area code is located so I can not decipher where you are from by your number, not that everyone lives in the same place their area code is located anymore.

If you are a friend of mine, or I have texted with you multiple times, then I know you, but when I text you I will try and start with, “Hi, It’s Dana.” If I think you don’t know me that well I will say, “Hi, It’s Dana, the Mah Jongg teacher.” Or “Hi, It’s Dana Lange.” Or “Hi, it’s Dana Carter,” if you knew you from school.

I would like if we could go back to the earlier times when someone introduced people to me and gave me their back ground. I would also like everyone when they come into a room where people are gathered, they don’t assume everyone knows their name. Just introduce yourself. Never say, “ Nice to meet you.” In case you have met before, and you don’t remember. Always say, “Hi, I’m Dana Lange( insert your real name). It’s nice to see you.” Nice to see you does not mean I have or have not met you before. It covers all situations.

One thing I have seen when I used to interview famous or well-known people for Durham Magazine, is even the most well-recognized person would introduce themselves when I first met them. The less important someone was, the more likely they would assume I knew who they were, or that they did not warrant my needing to know their name.

Everyone is worthy of being known by name, just tell everyone what it is and never assume everyone knows you. You are important, but you are never too important.

No Hate

The election is 45 days away. I know it feels longer if you watch TV because political ads seems to make time stand still. I did not watch any TV for the six weeks I was away. I did watch the debate on my iPad on CSPAN, so I avoided ads.

Since I have come home and resumed my TV watching habits by about 50% of what it was before I left I have come to one conclusion. Who you Vote for this year should be boiled down to one trait… kindness.

If a candidate is about hate, how can they possibly be for the whole electorate? Electing people who say they are for one group, but not others is no way to run a country, state, county or town. You should fear people who call out groups or individuals to be hated.

Our elected officials are supposed to work for the whole. If you elect someone who tells you they hate someone today who you do not identify with, you have no guarantee that you might not be in the next group they decide to hate.

When one particular national candidate posted, “I hate Taylor Swift” that is the sign of someone who is incapable of holding the highest office in the land because writing you “hate” someone is first, childish and second unkind. When that same candidate’s running mate spreads stories about legal immigrants eating dogs and cats, even after learning that someone made up that story, it is nothing but unkind, by demeaning of a group he wants people to hate.

We did not have so much public hate before we had a President who publicly sided with some Americans and was against others. This division is not what most Americans want and the difference comes down to those who believe it is fine to be unkind and those who are kind.

The most important thing we can do in America in 45 days is bring Kindness back and say no to divineness.

Starting Fresh

Since we had to completely start fresh with new food from the death of our last kitchen refrigerator we decided to clean out the garage fridge/freezer. We have had this appliance for so many years. It might be as old as Carter. We bought it at Sears. It was branded as a “Gladiator,” meant to be put in the garage or man cave because it had this tough looking exterior. I wish they still made this line. They had garage cabinets to match, but we couldn’t afford them back then.

The beauty of the gladiator was that it was one of the first “convertible” refrigerators. That does not mean that you could put the top down. The bigger section on the bottom is a freezer, the smaller section on the top could be a freezer or a refrigerator. It is the perfect extra refrigerator because we mostly needed more freezer space and we used the top as a place to keep drinks cold.

My problem is things go in the freezer and they don’t always get eaten. So we cleaned out all the old containers of soup and stock and cleaned the inside as if it were in a hospital. We were only able to do this so completely because we moved anything frozen that we wanted to keep up to the new freezer.

Russ did all the horrible work. What would I do without him? Now we are working on not collecting leftovers and eating what we have already made. Last night I made Salad Nicoise with salmon. I had leftover green beans and boiled fingerling potatoes so tonight I made lemon chicken with potatoes and green beans, we only ate half of it so we will have the same thing tomorrow. No leftovers. Carter is never going to believe this.

Bringing Maine to NC

Some years I bring jam home, others canvas bags. This year I brought a wooden canoe model I bought at auction. Jam comes and goes and bags could be from anywhere, but this little canoe is very Maine to me. Although, it could be New Hampshire too.

When I was a kid I went to summer camp at Camp Idlepines for Girls. It was a sweet little camp on Bow Lake in New Hampshire. It was run by Jan Adams, a woman who lived in my town of Wilton, CT in the off season and her sister Jane, who lived in Falmouth, MA.

I loved camp and canoeing was my favorite activity, quickly followed by arts and crafts and dramatic arts. Horse back riding was my least favorite. When I was a senior camper we got to go on a three night canoe trip where we camped beside the lakes and rivers we canoed on. It was an “away” trip, meaning they drove us somewhere with the canoes and equipment and dropped us off.

I remember bringing a sleeping bag to camp for camp outs, but other than that, no special equipment. Water shoes were not a thing. I wish I knew what shoes I brought. All I remember is I loved that canoe trip. I loved it so much that when I went back to camp the next year as a CIT, I was assigned the canoe CIT role, as well as dramatic arts. Somehow, someone else got arts and crafts. Thank god I did not get archery or horse back riding since they were the activities where you got the hottest.

So here we are, back from Maine and fifty years from my camp days. But all the canoe happiness is still with me. I am certainly not as good at getting in and out of a canoe as I was then, but paddling at dusk listening for loons, is a memory I will always cherish. Now when I come in the living room I just smile.

Sweet, Sweet Friends

Old friends, new friends, young friends, long-term friends, dear friends, fast friends, I love them all. Today I had lunch with a wonderful group of Mah Jongg students turned friends. For the record two of them have had lunch with me three days in a row, as they never want me to possibly eat lunch alone.

The greatest joy of my mah Jongg teaching career is the many friends I have made. These friends are generous, kind, fun, hilarious, witty, smart and great company. I may have only known them a few years, but I cherish them so. Thanks to Mary Jo, Bit, Jill and Holly for being the T4 gang, minus Mary Ann. I’m just always sorry I only get an hour break for lunch and I can’t linger and gab with you all longer.

I got home from work to discover the most heartfelt note from my BFF Suzanne. It was so sweet to get a written note, not text, or email. We had four good different visits together between Grace’s wedding and Maine this summer. But her note of love for our 45 year friendship really made me happy.

This summer I have two friends going through significant health issues and I have been keeping up by reading their daily messages and seeing their photos. One common thread is how much their friends have come through and provided and continue to provide for them. They both have wonderful families who are fantastic support, but friends are the icing on the cake.

My best advice to people is don’t ever think you have enough friends and stop making new ones. Also, having friends of different ages, and life stages is highly desirable. One of my friend’s older sister told her that all her friends are moving to nursing homes or dying off and she and her husband are far from either of those two realities. She told her sister, “We decided we just have to get some younger friends.”

Don’t wait to get younger friends until all your old friends die off. It’s too hard then. Get younger friends now, and older friends and stay in touch with your current friends. It may feel like it is a lot to do, but real friends can go a long time between conversations and you will pick right back up from where you left off as if a minute has not passed. That’s how you know they are a true friend.

Don’t Be Misled

I am very tired of hearing the question in Trump ads saying things were less expensive when he was president. Of course they were because it was seven, six, five and almost four years ago. Unless there is deflation, meaning a depression or real recession, prices are always going up. The way a growing economy works is prices are always going up. You just want them to go up by a steady about 2%.

The pandemic threw the world economy into a tailspin. The question should be, how is America doing compared to the rest of the world on the recovery from the pandemic. The answer is actually, “Damn good.”

When Trump was president Wages did not go up to cover inflation, but in the last eight months, wages have now gone up more than inflation. Now that does not mean for everyone’s individual wages, but the nation as a whole. This is the good news. So wages are up and inflation is down, getting close to the 2% goal.

Are we paying more for things? Yes, you are always paying more for things. That is what inflation is. Trump had inflation in all the years he was president. He couldn’t ask you if you were paying less for things from the start of his Presidency to the end before the pandemic, because the cost of things went up while he was president.

The president does not control the economy, but has an effect on it. Biden deserves credit for taking the pandemic economy and bringing wages up and eventually bringing inflation down. All the while we also have had great gains in employment, improvement in infrastructure and bringing manufacturing jobs back to the US in critical industries, like chip making.

Yes, we had some terrible inflation in the two years following the pandemic. But it was a pandemic. It was bound to screw everything up. The key is that the US is getting back to more normal economic cycles now.

Asking people if they are paying more today than they did seven years ago is akin to asking people if their child had a cold in the last seven years. The answer is guaranteed to be, “Yes.” That does not mean that Trump can make the prices down down if he were to be president again.

In fact Goldman Sachs warned that a Trump win would likely lead to an economic downturn turn, but a Democratic victory would cause growth. Goldman Sachs is not exactly a liberal bastion.

So if you care about your own finical future and you are not a billionaire trying to avoid taxes, then Trump is your worst economic choice. I know plenty of people who think Trump is better for the economy, but the facts just don’t prove that. How can someone who declared bankruptcy six times really be better for the economy. Don’t be misled by simpleton ads.

I Need A Check List

After taking six weeks off it was time to go back to work today. Teaching mah Jongg is something I can do in my sleep, but apparently remembering to bring everything I need to teach is not.

I repacked my car yesterday with six Mah Jongg sets, my big teaching card, my easel, pointer and Mah Jongg cards. I had a giant beginners class in the morning and a wonderful class of returning friends for Beyond Beginner. Thankfully beginner was the first class. As I was getting everyone set up I realized I forgot my IPad, which I need to teach Beyond Beginner.

I looked at the list of students in the Beyond class and saw Margie was coming so I texted her and asked her to bring her iPad. Thanks goodness for great students.

I used to have the kind of memory that could recall things easily. If I thought about a recipe I could remember all the ingredients when I went to the store. No list needed. Then if I wrote a list, the act of writing it would then put things in my memory to the point where it did not matter if I brought the list, I knew it.

Apparently based on today, I think I not only need a list, I need to double check it. I have been teaching Beyond Beginner for three years now, you think I would remember I needed my iPad.

One disclaimer, when I was in my late twenties I noticed that if I was on the third floor of my house and went down to the basement to get something I often forgot what I went down for. I would look around to see what might interest me that could possibly be the reason for going down three flights of stairs. I would find something and bring it up, knowing full well that was not the item. As soon as I got back to the third floor, then I would remember.

I think that poor memory issue was actually my body’s way of creating an exercise program to run up and down the stairs. For some reason that issue does not happen to me now. Perhaps my body got tired of that trick and said, “We are going to remember and not make you run up and down.”

Maybe I am not half as busy now as I was then with a full time traveling sales job and a catering business at the same time.

As for now, I think I might want to make a check list, at least for the week back from vacation.

Crime Scene No More

For the last three weeks we were in Maine we had fabulous, dry and cool weather. Came home to North Carolina to an unnamed tropical storm. Not terrible in Durham, but down east is bad. I am thinking of all my friends down there and hoping the storm does not do too much damage.

I was awoken early by texts from Carter asking me about car services I used in Germany. Turns out she is in the center of European floods. The Train she and Claire were taking from Germany to Vienna was canceled at Lutz. I didn’t have the answer, but thankfully the hotel they are staying at in Vienna was able to get them car service from Lutz to Vienna. Thankfully they made it into to Vienna and then I saw the floods in Vienna on the news. Glad I knew they were safe before I saw that.

I stayed home all day, missing two different friends’ birthday celebrations, to wait for my new refrigerator. The two guys from Lowe’s who brought it were fantastic. They took away the crime scene and installed the new one with no problems. Thankfully I knew how to turn the house water off so they could install the water line without incident.

That issue will officially be in the rear view minor as soon as the fridge makes two rounds of ice I can throw away. Then tomorrow after teaching two classes I can buy some food to go in that fridge. Won’t be much as we are just the two of us and one small brown dog. Russ had the brilliant idea that we could clean out the garage freezer, by moving anything from it up stairs and doing a deep cleaning on that appliance. Oh what an exciting weekend we are going to have next weekend. Maybe this will start a cleaning out revolution. No more Crime scene here.

Vacation Recovery Schedule

If you go away overnight, your recovery time once you get home is about twenty minutes. Sort, one days mail, unpack one outfit, put clothes in hamper, not enough for a load of laundry, everything in the house is just as you left it.

Go away for the weekend— recovery time is about 30 minutes. Not much more than an overnight.

Go away for a week — recovery time is about seven hours hours. Sort the mail and deal with the recycling that inevitably comes from junk catalogs, unpack the suitcases and run a dark and a light laundry, fold and put away. Go to the grocery and restock milk, eggs, bread, fruits and veg. Make sure nothing went astray outside of the house.

Go away for a month— recovery time is about ten hours. All the things you do in a week, but more laundry, more mail, more shopping and paying the house sitter.

Go away for six weeks — recovery time is three days. Everything in a month, plus cleaning out the broken fridge, throwing away all the food that has broken down and liquified and turned to mold, then going to the store to buy a new fridge, waiting three days for it to be delivered so you can go to the store and spend twice as much time rebuying all the condiments you had to throw away. Getting over the heart break of throwing out all the tomatoes you oven dried in hopes of turning them into soup this winter.

I may be recovered by tomorrow. One can only hope.

Someone Should Always Live In a House

An empty house is one waiting to go wrong. We left ours for six weeks. I had a house sitter, watering plants, taking in packages, checking on things. But not all things.

We pulled in tonight from our two day drive home. The outside looked like I would expect. The garage seemed fine. I came in the house. Smelled a little funny, but the air conditioning had not been running very cold while we were away and I had only turned it up remotely at lunch time. There were a couple dead bugs on the floor. Maybe that was it.

Russ went up to the kitchen first to put Shay’s cold food, we had in the car, away in the fridge. Thank god it was Russ who first opened the fridge because I would have fainted.

Apparently our refrigerator died some weeks back. It had turned into the worst kind of horror movie if only horror movies came with smells of rotting flesh.

I will spare you all the details, but it took us over an hour and ten trash bags and a gallon of simple green to clean it out and put the shelves back in and shut the doors. Multiple towels were sacrificed and all I can say is don’t walk by our trash bin on Monday night.

Off to Lowe’s we went at 7:00 PM and bought a new refrigerator that will be here Monday. Until then we have all the fans running and doors shut. I am sequestered in our bedroom which is as far from the kitchen as I can get and have taken the longest shower of my life.

My Least Favorite Day of The Year

I woke up this morning to my last sunrise of 2024 in Maine. Russ and I had the added bonus of Suzanne still being with us. Her presence made the packing up process less horrible, but still sad. I have been away from Durham for almost six weeks, which is a long time. And I miss home and Durham friends and Mah Jongg students, but that is reality and Maine is magic.

We bid farewell to Little Island Lane and with Shay in her memory foam car seat we headed down route 1 for the drive I dislike the most. The drive from Owl’s Head to Buck County is nine hours without a stop or any traffic. In reality you need to add two hours for traffic nightmares, gas’s and potty breaks. If you stop for lunch add another hour.

We did not stop for lunch as I had made sandwiches. Russ and I spilt one for lunch and the second one for dinner when we got to his father’s house eleven hours later.

Shay was her best traveling dog yet. I guess she is much happier when we are all in the car.

The worst part of the trip is through southern Connecticut, New York and New Jersey until Princeton. The last hour is not bad, but by then I am so tired it feels worse than it should.

I can’t explain exactly why, but the drive to go home is never as much fun as the drive to go someplace new. The anticipation of a new trip gives the driving part a purpose that feels exciting. I am happy to go home, but the drive part is horrible. I wish that I could blink my eyes and be home. I don’t veer off the path if I see something interesting on the way home the way I do on the way to a place. Maybe I need to try that to make this trip better.

It’s just hard to add extra hours onto an already long trip. Tomorrow will be shorter, but not by much. At least it makes tomorrow my second least favorite day of the year.

Live, Laugh, Dance?

It’s our last Dance. Actually our last day in Maine. Suzanne is with us to help keep my mind off the sadness of the end of summer vacation. Russ still had so much work all day and Shay kept him company. Suzanne and I went to Camden so she could finally meet Warren and he could finally meet her. It was the collision of two of my favorite people. Suzanne also endeared herself to Warren by buying an art deco Necco Waffer jar from his store 10 Medhanic.

I said my good byes to Warren and Suzanne and I continued on our adventures, to pick up a plate she needed and then to Rockport. We went to the sweet book store across the street from the giant library. I always find that interesting in a tiny town with not much commerce that one of the few stores just sells book across the street from a place that lends you books for free.

From there it was back to Claws for one final lobster roll. No better food on earth. No discussion. Drop the Mike.

On our way home we stopped by the Owl’s Head General store and bought some owl themed Christmas ornaments. Got to support the local economy.

Back home for the packing session of the day. We don’t bring too much to this tiny house so it does not take long to pack. No one cares what you wear in Maine so we wear the same clothes everyday. The thing that took the longest was cleaning out the refrigerator.

Our last dinner was at In Good Company. We were in good company as we were sitting in the table in the front window Suzanne pointed out the Restaurant motto, Wine, Food, friends. Russ tried to get in on the act and said it was like, “Live, love, Dance.”

For a man who does not dance I got a good laugh as he mixed up the phrase, “Live, Love, Laugh.” We may not have done any dancing while we have been here, we have laughed, and loved, and a lot Living our best life.

Avoiding Reality

We only have two more days in Maine, but I am totally not accepting that reality. So to do my “I am squeezing every last drop out of summer,” impression, I invited Suzanne back to visit us for our last Maine days.

This is great since we still have so much to rehash about her daughter’s most wonderful wedding and to catch up on every thing else that happened this year.

Normally I would be starting the packing up process, but now that I have Suzanne I can drop that out until the last minute and she will help. So tonight we went to an author’s talk at the Rockport Opera House, sponsored by the library foundation. Tess Gerritsen, an author of almost 40 books, with TV shows and Movies made out of many of them, (like Rizzoli and Isles) was giving a talk about how to write a novel. This was right up Suzanne and my alley. Suzanne is a much more serious writer than I am. She works at it, with a writing group and teacher.

I am just a daily blogger with a thirteen year daily blog and no planning, editing, plot or sometimes even a thought. We did enjoy listening to the author and learning about her processes. It is a process and I am not sure I have the disciple to write a novel. Perhaps some greeting card copy.

We came home from the talk and had dinner with Russ of all the leftovers in the fridge. The Fish Tacos were good yesterday, but better today. Suzanne is an appreciative eater so I love feeding her.

After dinner we had to watch some post debate commentaries, or rather comedies. Steven Colbert was a high point, hitting on all my favorite points of ridiculous, the eating cats and dogs, Victor Oban as the personal reference why Trump is the BEST leader and my favorite, “a concept of a plan.” Please if you are reading me and still are considering voting for Trump, I would like to have a few minutes of your time to point a few things out. We can make it a one on one talk. I just need to try and understand.

Enough from me as Suzanne and I stayed up way too late telling stories about our dear Hugh Braithwaite who we miss so badly. Sending love to all his peeps.

I have one last full day of Maine vacation before the long trek home and back to reality. I’m still in avoidance mode for a tiny bit.

Packing in as Much as Possible on these Last Maine Day

We come to Maine for a month and it never fails that the last few days I try and do twice as much because I just don’t want it to end.

This morning I was out of the house at 7:30 to pick up my friend Warren for a big day of treasure hunting. I was looking for things to create Christmas items with and he was looking for antiques. He loves the hunt, I do for a while and then start to glaze over. I like the trip, the seeing new places in Maine and the scenery.

The night of the trip was the discovery of a store that even Warren had never heard of, but the second I drove by, I said, we are turning around and going to this store. What in the world could have enticed me so much?

THIS SIGN… Hussey’s Maine’s Largest General Store…. GUNS. WEDDING GOWNS? COLD BEER.

What was not intriguing about this? The only thing wrong was the order. It should be Cold Beer, Guns, Wedding Gowns.

We went in and it was a fabulous store! I was no allowed in the wedding gown Rea as it is my appointment only, but I was able to get this photo and sure enough there were many wedding dresses. For the record an old man did hit on me in the coffee aisle so maybe in the small town of Windsor, Maine they have a lot more weddings than your average town.

We were off to Fairfield Maine for our last searching trip. As I was searching for treasurers I came upon this little box of scrabble letters where someone had spelled out HARRIS. Hope is alive in Maine.

I had to get home because we were having my college friend Glenn Zeiders and his wife Kathy for dinner. They brought three of their four dogs to play with Shay for dinner and all the dogs did quite well. We were able to sit on the deck and eat outside to keep all the dogs happy and it was great getting to know them both better. In the really small world that we live in Russ had a business call with a guy he just met today who knew Glenn from the Navy. Everything comes full circle.

After the Zeiders left we watched the debate. All I can say about that is all our pets seemed to be safe and told us they have no fear of being eaten.

Happy Birthday to my Sister Margaret

My sisters have birthdays a week apart making this birthday season at my childhood home. I think that getting a baby sister for her birthday was not exactly the present Margaret wanted when she was six, but Janet turned out to be the gift that keeps on giving.

I sent Margaret a very good gift today because she turned 60. Our father was still alive when I turned 60 and I knew he was in a very bad way because he completely forgot about it and when I mentioned it to him weeks later he did nothing to make amends. It hurt me, but I knew he was not well.

I didn’t want Margaret’s 60 to be like that. When Janet turns 60 I’ll do the same for her. Margaret said she was happy to be turning 60 because then it is OK if you look old because you are old. I agree. When I was younger and someone asked me my age I always added ten to fifteen years just to get a reaction out of them.

“Wow, you look great.”

“Well I’m really (subtract 15 from the number I gave them).” It changes everything.

I never understood why women lied about how old they were, making themselves younger, that is so much harder to keep up.

So Happy Birthday Margaret. You will always be younger than me!

So Nice We Did It Twice

Hiking with the little brown Dog yesterday was so enjoyable we decided to do it again today. Our trail of choice was the Clarke Island Preserve in St. George. It is just across the causeway from the CraignAir Inn.

We arrived at exactly the wrong time because all the parking at the Inn was full. Russ was instructed to go to the overflow parking, only 8/10’s of a mile back and hopefully there would be a bike to ride back to the Inn. I waited with Shay at the Inn. Eventually Russ came running down the road. The couple right before him took the last two bikes to ride back to the Inn. They weren’t smart enough to leave one person at the Inn so that they would use only one bike to get back. Just more steps for Russ.

Clark Island is uninhabited, except for the Island caretaker. This means that once you cross the causeway and are on the Island, well behaved dogs who answer to voice commands can be off leash. Shay was in heaven. As the leader of our pack this meant she was always out front. If she got to far she would turn back and look at us with that, “What is taking you so long” face.

She is an excellent trail dog, especially given her cataracts. At one point in in the hike, when she was first let off leash she had the zoomies and ran all round Russ. She went almost five miles today. No one would guess she is 13.

After our three hours in St. George we headed back to Owl’s Head General store. It was surprisingly closed for a four day weekend for staff to recover from the summer. So we went into Rockland. To our surprise there were three Cruise ships in the Harbor. Two were the tiny American Cruise Line ships that we are used to seeing here. But one was. Holland American giant 5,000 passenger ship. A guy in the harbor told us it had gotten in this morning.

I don’t know what in the world it did here, because they would have to use tenders to get people off that boat and on to shore. They didn’t stay that long because when we got home the ship was cruising by our house. It was by far the biggest boat I have seen out front of us.

Just seeing that boat made me glad I was in this little house, perched on a rocky shore, not going anywhere, well maybe just hiking.

A Day in Friendship

The first year we came to Maine for a month Russ did it with the idea he would not work his regular job, but write a book instead. Not a page was written, not a day was taken off work. I gave up on the idea of him taking a month’s vacation and thankfully always have plenty to do.

Today being Saturday, Russ woke up and wanted to take the whole DAY OFF! It was unheard of, no work? So we looked at our hiking maps and decided to go to Friendship, Maine. We had been before, but not to this particular preserve and not to the Jameson Point Lobster.

Shay was so excited when we told her she was going. She bowed down to get her harness on and off to the car she ran. She is a great sport about her car seat and she looked out the window all day taking in the sights.

We went first to Jameson and had lunch. Russ had not had a lobster roll all summer so I’m glad it was such a yummy one. Then we set off for the Martin Point Wildlife preserve. We found the trail head with it’s two car parking lot. We were the only car and it appeared we were the only hikers on all the trails for the whole time. It was a lovely hike through a moss covered forest with two different stops for water views, one the ocean harbor and the second a crystal lake.

Shay, at 13 years old loves to hike. She insisted on leading the way. If she stopped to smell the markings and I passed her she quickly gave up the sniff to get in front of me. There was some elevation on this trail, but nothing too terrible. Going down is so much harder on me, but thankfully I did not trip on any of the exposed roots. It was sweet with the forest shade and the cool Maine Day.

After our hike we drove all around Friendship and Cushing deciding which houses we liked best. Both Russ and I agreed we liked the old ones on the water that look like old camp buildings. But they were still two million dollar camp buildings, despite the fact that they looked like they still had knob and tube electric.

We stopped at an honor vegetable stand and bought some corn and green beans. An old man pulled in in his pick up truck and Russ had to help him do the math to figure out how many ears of corn he could buy for his five dollar bill, when the corn was .75¢ an ear. He was old enough that he should have learned that basic math and was not one of those new-math -home-not-really-schooled people. Russ gladly helped him and thankfully he also had a quarter so he could get his money’s worth rather than generously giving the farmer an extra .50¢ tip as he could not get change from the honor box.

We stopped back at Jameson’s for ice cream because Russ saw they had pup cups when he ordered our lobster rolls. A Pup cup there was a cup of vanilla ice cream with two tiny dog biscuits in it for $2. What a deal. Shay was expecting a Dixie cup of whipped cream. She took a long time to eat all the ice cream.

One last stop at the Langais Art Preserve. It was sprinkling so we didn’t do the art hike, but did enjoy the wood sculptures at the trail head. I especially liked the one that was inspired by the Wyeth Painting of Christina’s world, which was painted not far from where we were.

It was a fun filled day off with Russ. I can only imagine how much fun he would have if he took two days off.

Stretching When Describing Amenities

Russ follows the local Owl’s Head news, not just during the summer when we are here, but year round. Summer news is different because of summer people like us, but winter news is the most interesting to him. Russ knows what is going on with the library and when the pie sale is being held. He keeps up with the young owners of the Owl’s head General store and knew when they had their baby early.

The news he follows also covers what is going on in Rockland, otherwise there would not be enough news to warrant even a monthly edition. He likes to read the real estate listings because the non-water front or water view properties often have colorful descriptions.

This week there was a new tiny house, right on Main Street, not far from Owls Head, that came on the market. When Russ mentioned it to me, I knew exactly which house it was because a sign had gone up in front of it.

Two bedrooms, one bath, just under 900 square feet. The second sentence in the description is the one that really caught Russ’ eye. “Close and convenient to the fish market, butcher, grocery …”

We discussed at length that never have we said, “What is most important to us is that we can walk to the fish market.” In fact, it would usually be the opposite. “I really don’t want to live within smelling distance of a fish market.”

It is also curious that this new listing mentions the butcher second, because the butcher has gone out of business. The grocery store is more like a bodega. I’m sure if you don’t have a car you could survive on what they sell at that grocery, but you could never begin to afford the fish store. I can hardly afford that fish store. I drive up to Rockport and go to their fish store.

But if there is some pescatarian looking for a cozy little cottage, with no water views, but all the fish they can buy, there is a tiny house, with a few new windows available for you. The listing doesn’t say it, but you could walk to the bakery if you wanted a nice stroll. Better smells at the bakery than the fish store.

I Adore my Friends, But Not The Shopping

I can’t say that I was kidnapped today since I was driving, but by the time we got to our fourth Goodwill/thrift shop I felt like I had been. I am not complaining because today was my day to spend with my friends Warren and Julie and they love thrifting. Warren does it to find things to sell at his Antique shop and Julie likes the hunt. As neither a thrifter, nor shopper of any kind I don’t love it, but am happy to help Warren find the things he is searching for… for a while.

We started the day in Damariscotta, at Miles Hospital thrift store. I have been before and like the place as they are good merchandisers and have fun specials of the day. Today anything orange was 50% off as well as anything metal. I found neither, only two Elizabeth Stout books and two tiny needlepoint canvases, all for $12. That would be all I would find for myself for the day, which made me perfectly happy.

We headed to Brunswick, home of Bowdoin College and since we took back roads I got to see beautiful places as well as have fabulous conversations with my friends. This stop was a Goodwill. Not as good.

We then went to Bath and had lunch at a yummy place called Wild Oats. I had a cup of fish chowder that was devine. The weather was also perfect and we ate outside under big sun shades.

Our next stop was in Freeport at the community Thrift store. It was the cleanest and best merchandised thrift shop I have ever seen, but I was beginning to wane. This was already more stores than I usually go in for a month. I had run out of iced tea and realize I should have gotten some at lunch.

On our way to the last store I told my friends I was happy for them to go in and shop as long as they wanted as long as I did not have to go inside too. It was the Topsham Goodwill and apparently it was the mother load of things Warren was looking for. I had a great time in the car clearing out my email and texts and listening to my audible book. Eventually Julie and Warren came out and filled the way back of my car.

We headed back to Damariscotta to get Julie to her car and then on to round top ice cream, the best ice cream in Maine. We enjoyed our reward treats on the back deck over looking the beautiful round top farm. It was a very full day and the sights and company were worth the pain of the stores.

Jamie!

It was my annual lunch with my friend Jamie. We went to both high school and college together, although she was two years ahead of me. So I have known her since I was 14. In the 49 years I have known her she has always remained just as kind and fun as always. She is proof that people come out the way they are going to be.

We met in Belfast at Chase’s Daily, one of my favorites. Although I love the place they did a thing I never understand in some restaurants. Jamie ordered the Frittata. She asked for a side salad with it. I was getting the pizza of the day with a side salad, which was an offering. The order taker, who was a lovely woman, said they could not give Jamie a side salad. Jamie wasn’t asking them to give it to her.

My pizza square could be ordered alone or with the side salad. Alone it cost $6.95, with the salad it was $15. Jamie’s frittata was $7.95. Why couldn’t they give her a side salad with the frittata for $16?

I, of course, asked why they couldn’t do it. Jamie said I sounded like her mother. (Who by the way is someone I really liked.) Jamie was too nice to argue. I gave her half my salad, but thought the whole thing was ridiculous. It doesn’t make me dislike Chase’s, but sometimes I wonder who makes these arbitrary decisions.

It’s not like they have a very big menu at Chase’s, one sandwich, two different salads, a couple different pizzas, Frittata, some bakes goods and smoothies. They do have fabulous produce which they grow at their own farm. Perhaps the issue is they are really farmers and not hospitality people. They certainly aren’t business people because they could sell a lot more salads if they offered it on the side of the pizza, the frittata or the sandwich.

Sweet Note

I was making my breakfast this morning. Russ had already eaten and was on a call on the deck. I went to open the fridge and saw some writing on a magnetic pad attached to the freezer door. As there are all kinds of things on the freezer door I did not really ever take notice if there was writing on this pad before. So I read it.

Turns out it was a litany of thanks you from Claire and Carter, just waiting to be discovered. I am so glad I did notice it. It was so sweet. (And no one was lying.)

There is nothing better than adult children and their partners. Having them with us for six days was a big treat. It just doesn’t happen easily to get to spend time with your adult children if they don’t live close by.

I remember my Dad always saying that his favorite people were his children as adults. He always put pools and nice guest rooms, or guest houses in his homes. He said he did this so we would come and visit. It worked. What he does not know is of we would have visited even without those things.

I hope to always have a place that Carter wants to come and visit and bring those who are important to her.

I feel sad when I hear that people have moved to such small homes that there is no room for visitors. Maybe other people don’t like their kids, but they might like their grand kids.

Since I am not near being a grand mother I am going to enjoy any chance I have to be with my kid and her person. I really like them.

Getting Over the Sad

We had a great five days with Carter and Claire, but sadly they had to go back to Boston today. They stayed for a Yummy breakfast prepared by Russ. He went all out with your choice of an egg, sausage and cheese English or blueberry pancakes. No one complained, especially because we got to play Apples to Apples which waiting for and after breakfast. It was an incredibly close game.

Then it was time for them to pack up the car. We practically filled it, between their clothes, the presents Suzanne sent for Carter and the painting I bought at auction the car was full. I was so sorry to see them go. It was such a great little vacation with them as they are so sweet together and we adore Claire.

To make the day not so sad, Russ and I decided to go on a Sunset Schooner cruise in Rockport. It was a gorgeous day, perfect to sail. I made Russ bring a warmer shirt, which he was glad he did because after sailing up to Camden and back, when the sun went down behind the hill it was very cold out on the water. This is why being in Maine in September is the best. Not saying anything about the heat back home.

Most everyplace is closed since it is Labor Day as well as being Monday so we had a quick dinner at Ada’s in Rockland and came home to a quiet house. Shay was not happy to have been all alone. I understand sweet girl. I’m sad too.

Big Game Day

No, not football, although Carter and Claire did throw the football. Today we played lots of games. Uno, I will not say who won the majority, and who won none, but it was so fun. Then there was the Shay game.

She zoomed all around the yard getting everyone to chase her. When Claire, Carter and I had given up to read on the deck Shay came and sat by me. Then she realized that Russ was sitting in a chair by the water so she went back to do zombies with just him and herded him up onto the deck where she was happy she had gotten us all together. She is an Australian Labradoodle after all so maybe she has some herding tendencies.

Tonight we played Apple to Apples and again I won’t say who won, but we had a grand ‘ole time. I am going to miss my girls when they leave. It has been the best vacation to have them here. Sadly they have to go back to work since they are going to Europe next weekend.

How quickly little ‘ole Maine will be replaced with Switzerland, Germany and Austria. Hooray for them.