Lather, Rinse and Repeat
Posted: June 19, 2013 Filed under: Diet- comedy Leave a comment »
Long ago when I could still read mice type found on shampoo bottles without the aid of shower readers, I found the instructions “Lather, rinse and repeat,” lacking an ending to their story. The idea that someone needs shampoo instructions is somewhat comical. I don’t know about you, but by the time I was able to wash my own hair I had mastered the order and I probably was still too young to read.
I am wondering if the marketing department of shampoo makers thinks we will really keep repeating the three steps over and over until the bottle is empty. The addition of one word might clarify what they mean; “Once.” Lather, rinse and repeat once.” There it is. Something that makes much more sense. They certainly did not mean to keep washing your hair repeatedly until it all fell out.
To me instructions on things like shampoo were put on because some fool drank the shampoo since there were no directions about how to use it. That prompted a note from the legal department saying something to the effect of “For God’s sake tell the morons who buy our products how to use them so we don’t get sued again.” Marketing recognizing a opportunity decides that if one washing is good then more will be better and thus the “repeat” is born. It is shocking that legal has not jumped all over them for that one.
I just bought a new lemon scented bottle of 409 cleaner. It smells very realistic and lemony. I wonder if anyone has sprayed it on his or her fish or in their iced tea? I have not noticed a warning reading “Not real lemon, do not eat.”
What I think American corporations need are not more Legal or Marketing departments, but a Department of Common Sense. Most of us can figure out the obvious use of a product as long as we know what it is. So rather than take up vital real estate on shampoo bottles with unneeded instructions consider putting the word “Shampoo” in a font large enough for us to read without glasses because I just have not yet found a shatter-proof pair of readers to keep in the shower.
Don’t Ignore Chemistry
Posted: June 18, 2013 Filed under: Diet- comedy | Tags: chemistry, zone Leave a comment »Today is the day that I take Carter on all her appointments like hair and teeth and I get to sit there and needlepoint because I am just the driver these days. As I was eavesdropping on the hairdressers’ discussing a difficult dye job to fix another salon’s mistakes I heard a great phrase, “The chemistry is just not in her favor.” See the client wanted a miracle.
How many things does that phrase, “The chemistry is just not in her favor,” apply to in life? I can think of many. But so many times we want to ignore the chemistry and hope for a miracle outcome.
As the hairdressers discussed the nightmare-multi-processed situation the same theme kept coming up, if only the previous colorist had done the simplest process they could have easily reversed the mistake. Trying more and more complicated scenarios made going back even harder.
This is true with eating. If you want to reduce, trying overly complicated eating programs is harder. You need to figure out what chemistry is in your favor and the most simple. Many years ago there was a popular diet called The Zone. You had to eat an exact balance of protein, fats and carbs at the same time in blocks. Yes the chemistry worked, but it was so difficult that the over complication of planning and creating meals made it not in your favor.
The idea that things are better when the chemistry is right is true in relationships too. How many times do we see couples that are made up of people who are really more like oil and water? The two can be put together but they never will really mix.
The lesson is to pay attention to the elements in their simplest form and work from there. If you get the right elements together the chemistry will work and you won’t be fighting Mother Nature. Simplifying is your friend.
Reunion Afterglow
Posted: June 17, 2013 Filed under: Diet- comedy | Tags: Dave Harnish, Dickinson reunion, Maria Carson, Mel Kuhn, Pam Kurey, Sally Schoot, Suzanne Farley Leave a comment »
Best buddies Suzanne and Dave
Suzanne Sally and I all got the striped shirt memo
I just spent the weekend at my 30th college reunion and with each five-year passing people get better. One of the upsides of being over fifty is most people have softened into their nicest selves. Perhaps our aging eyes help us see people in a more easy-going light or our memories have let go of any past un-harmonies. Mostly I think that by this point in life it is not about what you have, the position you attained or how you look, but really the content of your soul.
There are those close friends who I have constant contact with who make the reunion comfortable and safe. One acquaintance said when I got there he was glad to see me because he had not seen anyone else he knew up to that point and was feeling like a freshman on the first day of college all over again. Those insecurities existed for just a second and quickly people relaxed into their true selves.
I loved sharing with people I have known more than half their lives, but not seen daily. We cut through all the frivolous and got right to the heart of what they were passionate about now, struggled with or hoped for. Of course there was the rehashing and laughing of old stories but people opened up about disappointments or difficult relationships or sadness’s but seemed to be quickly comforted by the love and compassion shown by the group.
The real bonus I find at reunions is getting to know people I did not really know well or deepen new or shallow friendships. I shared a room with my best friend Suzanne and we spent time talking with different people at the gatherings and then late in the night, in of the less than stellar Sleep Inn, we talked in the dark sharing the conversations we had.
Because of world of Facebook and things like this blog I had gotten to know some people much better in the last five years and the reunion was like a hug from a long lost friend. I love that I know Sally, Mel and Maria better now and treasure them even more. Sally even asked me how the reunion food was on my diet and thankfully with all the time being spent talking and very little time eating I lost a pound.
My thanks go out to the whole committee who worked so hard to bring us this perfect weekend. How they gave us weather that was better than any day we had a semesters of Fridays our Freshman year I will never know. A big shout out to Pam Kurey who by virtue of being married to Greg was an honorary member of the committee and seemed to work harder setting things up and taking things down than anyone else who was actually in our class.
No matter what is happening in your life going back to your reunion will enhance it. Don’t miss another opportunity to reconnect, rehash, reminisce and relearn. Everyone is better than you remember and so are you.
Love of Fathers
Posted: June 16, 2013 Filed under: Diet- comedy | Tags: Ed Carter, Russ Lange 4 Comments »
Anybody who knows me knows my father. See even if you never met him you have encountered him in some way in me. I am truly a product of my father. Of course my mother can be seen in me too, in my love of games, my artistic side and devotion to needlepoint, but most of the rest of me comes from my father. My love of cooking, my story telling nature, my sense of humor, my loud voice and imposing presence along with about nine hundred and fifty other traits including the tendency to exaggerate comes from my father.
On this father’s day I want to say thank you to Ed Carter for being such a great supporter, cheerleader, role model and overall generous soul to me. Although he pushed me all the time to be better, do more, try harder he also gave me options and advantages for which I am truly thankful. My dad always thought I could do anything. I am sure that is how I developed my “Not always correct, but never in doubt” personality.
As a child he never missed an opportunity to teach me something that he thought I would need to know even if I wasn’t interested. I might not have been interested then, but now I am glad I know how to take care of my house, earn money, grow a garden, cook anything, travel the world alone, be generous with others, talk to strangers so they quickly become friends, tip generously, nurture employees, spoil friends, love family and most importantly raise a daughter.
Thanks Dad for being a great dad. Because of you I picked a wonderful husband who became a great Dad to our child. Father’s day is not the only day I think about how important fathers are, but don’t let a day go by without knowing that I am surrounded by men who are father’s I love, my own and my daughters.
Reunion Confession
Posted: June 15, 2013 Filed under: Diet- comedy | Tags: Dickinson, reunion, sorority Leave a comment »My thirtieth college reunion is only half way through and I am already exhausted. It’s a the good type of tired from talking too much and standing and walking and talking some more. At this point in life I only remember about a blink of any eyes worth about my time in college so the reunion is like getting to know people I know I already like all over again. Except for my really close friends who can finish my stories or prompt me to retell something funny or poignant the reunion is a new audience.
Last night my best friend Suzanne and I had dinner with a group of people I had not hung out with much in college. One of them was a guy Jeffery who confessed to me that he was afraid of me in college. I asked him what that was about and he said that I always had an “aura of industry” about me. It is a strange sounding phrase, but really dead on. I was busy when I was here. I was bossy, and loud and organizing things and giving parties and running for office and selling things, not much studying.
In thinking about my industriousness today i thought about one of my college jobs that prompted me To make a confession to some of my sorority sisters today. For two years I was the membership chairman which was the worst job. During rush the chairman had to run the discussion and make these paper bags for all the sisters to put little votes in for the girls they wanted to continue. The first time we did this it took hours to count all the votes and then write the invitations for the girls who we wanted to continue. As I did it there were no real surprises about who got the votes based on the discussion I had heard.
Being industrious I decided, completely illegally in the sorority world, that I was not going to ever count another vote. We put the bags out at every discussion and people would put their slips of paper in, but I would just glance in them and write the invitations for the girls I heard the most positive comments about.
I apologize now for this, but I have to say we had two really great pledge classes who were coherent and turned into great sisters. I may be hauled off to sorority court for this confession, but I think that the statue of limitations was up long ago. I’m not Catholic, but I hear that confession is good for the soul. I know that reunions are good for the heart. So please forgive me.
Reunion Bound
Posted: June 14, 2013 Filed under: Diet- comedy | Tags: Dickinson college class of 1983, reunion 1 Comment »I’m taking my lunch break from my six and a half hour drive to Carlisle, PA at a panera bread in Warrenton VA. I am not breaking my no eating in the car rule and I think this will be my only free moment to write a quick blog posting before I am thrust into the world of old friend nostalgia.
I have not taken such a long car trip alone since I went to my last college reunion 5 years ago. At first I was a little fidgety and feeling unproductive as I just sat, no needle pointing, writing, reading or game playing. After surfing the many stations on the satellite radio I settled into the ’70′s on 7 to get me back into that college mood. Even though I spent more years in college in the 80′s I know with every song from the 70′s
The music has been the perfect way to get back in that college mood. I have way more memories of dancing than I do of classes. Probably not something I should admit, but as I listen to so many of the lyrics I am reminded it was a time of not much to worry about. Really, I can’t imagine a song about leaving the cake out in the rain because you won”t be able to make it again since you don’t have the recipe would be a big hit now.
Most everything I am listening to is about “come dance with me” or “don’t worry baby, everything will be alright.” So now that I am half way back to college I am fully in the laid back mood of college. I can’t wait to reconnect, reminisce, dance and jump a little higher. Now that I think about it I probably should have brought a sports bra.
Faux Whiskey Sour – By Accident
Posted: June 13, 2013 Filed under: Diet- comedy | Tags: basil, whiskey 1 Comment »
I am constantly on the search for a non-alcoholic-caffeine-free-zero-calorie drink. I gave up drinking almost thirty years ago and that is a story for another day. I have since lived mainly on iced tea, but after 6:00 PM I need to cut back on caffeine so that usually means I am stuck with just water.
Today I made up a drink that tastes practically like a faux whiskey sour and satisfies all my requirements. I was not trying to make a whiskey sour, but somehow the combination of basil and balsamic vinegar turns out like whiskey.
If I had an orange slice and a cherry it would look more like a drink on Mad Men.
This recipe makes one big serving
4 basil leaves
3 T. fresh lime juice
2 Splenda packets
1 t. balsamic vinegar
1 Cup fizzy water – I used San Pellegrino, but club soda is fine
Crushed ice
Whirl the basil, limejuice, Splenda and balsamic vinegar with a splash of fizzy water in a blender (I used my stick blender). Pour into a big glass and fill it half way with crushed ice. Fill the glass with the rest of the fizzy water. Stir. Enjoy.
